Grief

Grief is both a singular and a community process that takes various forms for the characters in the novel and forms the central conflict between Sam and Julie. Julie finds herself grieving mostly in private for Sam, avoiding the large gatherings organized by his friends and family because she wants to process her heartbreak in her own space. She is not even able to attend his funeral, finding it too difficult. Further complicating her relationship with her other friends, Julie is able to talk to Sam on the phone, and so she does not immediately have to accept his loss as everyone else does. She struggles to “bridge grief and hopefulness, without having someone take it the wrong way” (66).

For those who find more comfort grieving in public, however, Julie’s choice rankles them and appears callous and unfeeling. Oliver criticizes the public grieving on social...