The Scrolls Summary

An unknown narrator tells the tale of a shepherd wandering in the Gulf of Aqaba who accidentally stumbles upon a cave. Within, the narrator explains, the shepherd finds several scrolls, each written in a series of ancient tongues. While experts admit that the scrolls are likely forgeries, especially owing to the repeated use of the word "Oldsmobile" throughout the text, it is nevertheless named as a significant archaeological find. What follows, the narrator claims, are the words translated from the fragments themselves.

God and Satan enter into a wager based on whether or not Job, God's most devout follower, will abandon his faith when sorely tested by adversity. God mounts abuse upon Job, covering him with sticky sauce, slaying a tenth of his kind, and smacking Mrs. Job upside the head with a polo mallet. The abuse escalates until God carelessly...