The following version of the book was used to create this study guide: Moehringer, J.R. The Tender Bar. Hachette Book Group, New York, NY, 2021. Kindle AZW file.

Note: The author used the name JR as a child but was forced to add periods to be J.R. once he had his first byline in the New York Times. From that point, he referred to himself in the book as J.R. In this guide, he is referred to as Moehringer except in direct quotes. In those cases, he is referred to as JR as a child and J.R. after his first byline, in keeping with the book.

When John Joseph Moehringer, Jr. was an infant, an argument between his parents turned violent. Moehringer's mother Dorothy took her infant son – known to everyone as JR – and returned to her parents' home in Manhasset, Long Island. Dorothy occasionally managed to move them into a place of their own, but finances invariably forced them back. In addition to his grandparents (who fought constantly), Dorothy's brother Charlie lived with Moehringer's grandparents. Dorothy's sister Ruth often lived there with several of her children. No one talked about Moehringer's father. Though Moehringer knew the history between his parents, he longed for a connection with his father. He fed that need by listening to his father who was a disc jockey.

Moehringer feared he would be negatively influenced by living with so many women – his mother, grandmother, aunt, and several female cousins. He consciously sought out male role models and was enthralled at a young age by his Uncle Charlie who was a bartender at “the” neighborhood bar. Initially, the bar was named Dickens and later named Publicans. With the hope for a better life, Dorothy decided to move to Arizona when Moehringer was in middle school. The bills soon mounted up again. At barely 14 years of age, Moehringer landed a job dealing with customers at a bookstore in an almost abandoned mall. There he befriended two reclusive men – Bill and Bud – who began teaching him about literature. More importantly, they began to push him to think about college and convinced him he could attend Yale.

Moehringer spent each summer back on Long Island, learning about life from Charlie and strange array of friends. They taught Moehringer lessons that he felt he might have learned from his father, if Johnny had ever been around. As a sophomore, Moehringer walked the Yale campus for the first time and became determined to attend, though he doubted he would be allowed in. When he was accepted, he discovered he was ill prepared and did not fit in with his peers who were mostly from wealthy families with expensive early educations. He struggled through to graduation.

With his degree in hand and no real plan, Moehringer moved back in with his grandparents, spending most of his time at Publicans. He embraced the men there but finally accepted he had to have a job – any job. He sold housewares at a department store. Though he hated it, he was good at it. He had an on-again-off-again relationship with a wealthy girl he met at Yale and became a copy boy at the New York Times. When Moehringer had his first byline, an editor refused to let him use the name JR on his byline. So, he began using the name J.R. The weekend that the Yale girl married someone else, Moehringer expected to be promoted to reporter. Instead, he was cut from consideration and urged to get the experience he needed elsewhere.

For years, Moehringer spent virtually every evening at Publicans where he learned about the lives of the other regulars. They were all enamored with Steve, the owner of Publicans. Steve's death shook them all, and Moehringer realized it was time to make changes in his life. A short time later, he visited his father. At first, Johnny was taciturn, becoming talkative and fun once he had a few drinks. That night, the scene became violent and Johnny threatened Moehringer with a knife. This pushed Moehringer to make significant changes. He moved briefly to Colorado with one of his cousins and a friend. Soon, he broke into the newspaper business on a smaller scale than the Times. Over the next few years, he worked his way up. In 2001, he returned to Long Island to attend his cousin's funeral after the 9/11 attack on the World Trade Center. He renewed old friendships and worked on news articles before preparing to settle in his next newspaper position.