Summary

Chapter 38 described Jean’s “hurting time” in Sanary, which lasted through all of July and August. During this time, he worked at a local bookstore and allowed himself to feel pain. He allowed all of his feelings for Manon to surface, holding back nothing and finally allowing himself to grieve her loss.

One day, on the beach, Jean let the waves overcome him as he slipped into a daydream. He pictured Manon there with him. He apologized for abandoning her. He then saw himself at all stages of his life. He then realized how he had isolated himself and allowed his soul to die. When he awoke from his daydream, he was no longer sad, but angry. He screamed into the ocean, asking why Manon had to be taken from him.

Shortly after, he decided to call Catherine. He had to let her...