Summary

In “Active Shooter,” Sedaris’s sister, Lisa, picked him up from the Greensboro, North Carolina airport. In the car, she ranted about a woman who had brought her pet monkey into Starbucks. Lisa always criticized other pet owners. When they passed “a billboard for a firing range called ProShots,” Lisa suggested they go (4).

The next day, Sedaris and Lisa went to ProShots. Before they could shoot, they had to take a safety class led by a man named Lonnie. The class seemed silly to Sedaris. When they started shooting, Lonnie began calling Sedaris, Mike, which offended Sedaris. Lisa was a natural shooter.

On their way out, Lisa made a comment about a poster that said “Pansies Converted Daily,” suggesting it was an insult to gay people (10). Sedaris did not mind.

In the car, Sedaris asked Lisa to...