"She says he's got a tendency to get over-excited, which is the understatement of the century." (Chapter 1, page 5)

"He was a well-known jerk, which I partly blamed on the fact that his parents had named him Jasper. That would be enough to make anybody mean and mad at the world." (Chapter 2, page 12)

"My mother says that being married to my father is like having another child to watch after, one who's too big and unpredictable to put in time-out." (Chapter 2, page 20)

"My father's a large man, very strong, but he says fighting is for people who can't win with their brains." (Chapter 4, page 38)

"I wasn't proud that my dad was sitting in jail, but I knew he was a good person. Even when he flies off the handle, at least he's fighting for something close to his heart." (Chapter 4, page 46)

"My momma used to say, 'Keep your friends...