Chapter 18 Summary

Bernard and Helmholtz find John throwing up in the bathroom. When he comes out, they ask if he ate something disagreeable. John says yes, he ate Civilization. It poisoned him; he was defiled, and then he ate his own wickedness. But he drank some mustard and water and now he's purified.

They tell him they've come to say goodbye; they're off tomorrow morning. Bernard tells him how ashamed he is for everything that happened, but John presses his hand, and the three sit together silently, happy for the sadness, a symptom of their love. Then John says the Controller wouldn't let him go with them, because he wants to go on with the experiment. But he plans to go away tomorrow, to someplace where he can be alone.

John moves into an old lighthouse on a hill between Puttenham and Elstead. He has...