"I couldn't figure out what I had done to get in trouble so early in the year, but you can believe I was dying to know. I debated for about twelve seconds, but of course I gave in and ripped that sucker open like a rodeo bull going after a slow cowboy" (Lost in the Mail, p. 28).

"But if a regular, ordinary relationship is like juggling a bunch of different-size, jagged pieces of metal - and from what had been going on between my brother and Annette, that seemed to be a pretty good simile - then throwing cancer into the mix is like juggling a bunch of different-size, jagged pieces of metal while riding a skateboard on the edge of the Grand Canyon" (The Handsome Babe Magnet Rides Again, p. 55).

"By the end of an hour with Tad, I felt like my brain was going to explode...