Summary

On the evening of April 20, 1999 Sue finally gave up any hope that Dylan would return home. A member of the SWAT team later confirmed this fear when he informed Sue that her son was indeed dead. When she asked how he died, the SWAT member did not give an answer but Sue writes, “It seemed important to know. Had Dylan been killed by the police or by one of the shooters? Had he taken his own life? I hoped he had. At least if Dylan died by suicide, I’d know he had wanted to die. Later, I would come to regret that wish almost as bitterly as I’ve ever regretted anything” (18). That afternoon, Sue had initially thought to turn to prayer, as she had done throughout her life during times when she needed a sense of comfort. However, she had been unable...