Chapter 4, "I'm Going to Tell You Some News" Summary

This very short chapter starts with the announcement by Vonnegut that he has special news to announce. After confirming that he is not running for President, and he is not a closet pedophile, he seems to get serious in announcing he plans to sue the Pall Mall cigarette company, whose cigarettes he is addicted to and has been for most his life. The he reveals the reason for the lawsuit is that the cigarettes keep promising to kill him, yet here he is in his eighties.

Vonnegut transitions from his own addiction to others. The government has a war on drugs, which is better than no drugs at all. He also remembers the saying that Prohibition is better than no alcohol at all. He uses these observations...