Many researchers attribute the causes of family violence to pathological or personality disorders in the abusers. From this viewpoint, violent behavior is a reaction to some buried emotional scar from the abuser’s past: a son is beaten by his father, he represses the emotions, he grows up and enters a relationship, and he plays out the same scenario on his wife and children.

Others believe that violent behavior in the family is caused largely by stressful events. Perhaps a man loses his job or his wife cooks him the wrong dinner, and he reacts with violence. Many times the abusive behavior will be a completely irrational response to the triggering event.

In actuality, both perspectives are probably valid regarding the causes of violence in the family. In his book Battered Wives, writer Del Martin recounts a story uncovered...