What illogical conclusion does the narrator come to about R after their first sexual encounter, though she knows quite well how illogical it is?

On page 168, in one of the few humorous moments within the narrative, the narrator thinks about R after their first sexual encounter. She thinks to herself that while she knows that it is illogical to think so, she feels as if he is avoiding her. The humor and irony, of course, come from the fact that R is unable to leave the sanctuary of his hidden room for fear of being captured by the Memory Police.