How does Paul characterise his youth and life?

From the text:

"And so I have wasted the years since Darwin sitting at the piano, pressing keys and hearing only notes emerge, obsessed by technique in a way that he would never have approved."

"Can I know that mine was a foolish, innocent world, a world of delusion and feeling and ridiculous dreams—a world of music—and still love it?

Endlessly, effortlessly."