Print
Word
PDF
|
I Never Promised You a Rose Garden Chapter 3
On the ward at the hospital, Deborah could sometimes look out onto the real world from Yr. This brought to mind the moment that revealed the first hints of Deborah's illness. Deborah had written the name "Januce" Part 1, Chapter 3, Pg. 20 on the heading of her paper at school. She had taken the name Januce in Yr because she was looking out on the world and also on Yr simultaneously, and so she felt like the two-faced Greek god. When Deborah's teacher had asked her about the name, she lied to hide the world she'd created in her mind. After that, a Censor was created to guard the secrets of Yr from the earthly world and its members. Deborah knew then that the tiniest slip of the tongue could shatter the kingdom, and so the Censor was put in place to protect Yr. But over time the Censor began to intrude upon the earthly world and monitor Deborah's speech and actions there as well.
In Deborah's simple life on the ward she can exist in and out of reality. When she sees the other women on the B ward of the hospital, she wonders if anyone ever really gets well and leaves the hospital. In her mind, she can hear the Collect screaming at her that she'll always be crazy and she'll stay in the hospital forever.
Deborah meets Dr. Fried and they have their first session. Dr. Fried tells Deborah that she believes that if they work very hard together, Deborah will get well. To ease Deborah's fear, the doctor also explains that she will not pull away any of the symptoms of Deborah's illness until the girl is ready to let go of them. Deborah is relieved that someone finally acknowledges that she is really sick instead of telling her that there's nothing wrong with her when she knows that there really is a problem.
