Don Quixote Quotes

Quote 1:"I'm a loafer by nature, I'm too lazy to go hunting for authors who say what I already know how to say without their help." Volume 1, Prologue, pg. 8

Quote 2: "The ability to reason the un-reason which has afflicted by reason saps my ability to reason, so that I complain with good reason of your infinite loveliness." Volume 1, Chapter 1, pg. 13

Quote 3: "...which even Aristotle couldn't have comprehended if he'd come back to life just for that purpose." Volume 1, Chapter 1, pg. 14

Quote 4: "Let everyone in the world halt, unless the entire world acknowledges that nowhere on earth is there a damsel more beautiful than the Empress of La Mancha, she who has no equal, Dulcinea Del Toboso." Volume 1, Chapter 4, pg. 29

Quote 5: "Those who have been told the truth should not be taken for those who have been scorned." Volume 1, Chapter 14, pg. 78

Quote 6: "And the good gentleman was so far gone in his fantasy that neither the touch, the smell, nor anything else about the good damsel -- which would have made anyone but a muledriver vomit -- disillusioned him in the slightest." Volume 1, Chapter 16, pg. 89

Quote 7: "I'm sure, Señor, this is really the Moorish enchanter, who's keeping the treasure for other people, and saving, especially for us, all the heavy fists and banging lamps." Volume 1, Chapter 17, pg. 93

Quote 8: "I don't see how you could be righting wrongs...because you've turned me from right to wrong, leaving me with a broken leg." Volume 1, Chapter 19, pg. 107

Quote 9: "Now, señor, just see how Heaven, touched by my tears and my pleas has ordained that Rocinante shall not move." Volume 1, Chapter 20, pg. 112

Quote 10: "To tell you the truth...you've told one of the most novel tales ... anyone in the world has ever thought of, and the way you told it, and then ended it, is something never to be seen, and never ever seen, in the course of a lifetime, though I expected nothing less from your remarkable powers of reasoning." Volume 1, Chapter 20, pg. 114

Quote 11: "[S]traighten out the barber's basin you've got on your head." Volume 1, Chapter 22, pg. 133

Quote 12: "'That's exactly it,' replied Don Quijote, 'that's just how beautifully I've worked it all out -- because for a knight errant to go crazy for good reason, how much is that worth? My idea is to become a lunatic for no good reason at all.'" Volume 1, Chapter 25, pg. 151

Quote 13: "[F]or what I want of Dulcinea del Toboso, she's every bit as good as the noblest princess on earth." Volume 1, Chapter 25, pg. 156

Quote 14: "And so, to sum it all up, I perceive everything I say as absolutely true, and deficient in nothing whatever, and paint it all in my mind exactly as I want it to be." Volume 1, Chapter 25, pg. 157

Quote 15: "[W]e now enjoy...not only the delight of his own absolutely veracious tale but also all those other stories and narrative digressions which, to some extent, are no less delightful and skillfully told, and every bit as true, as his own history." Volume 1, Chapter 28, pg. 178

Quote 16: "[He] began to say such things to me that I cannot fathom how anyone could have such a facility at lying and still make his lies sound like truths. The traitor make his tears vouch for his words... I somehow began -- I don't know how -- to believe his lies, though...[they] didn't stir me to anything more than simple compassion." Volume 1, Chapter 28, pg. 182

Quote 17: "For the love of God, sir knight errant, if you ever meet me again, please, even if you see me being cut into little pieces, don't rush to my aid or try to help me, but just let me be miserable, because no matter what they're doing to me it couldn't be worse than what will happen if your grace helps, so may God curse you and every knight errant who's ever been born in the world." Volume 1, Chapter 31, pg. 209

Quote 18: "It seems to me utterly clear either that you do not really know me, or I do not really know you." Volume 1, Chapter 33, pg. 218

Quote 19: "A stubborn, stupid wish has taken my life. Should Camila happen to hear of my death, let her know I forgive her, because there was no need for her to perform miracles, nor should I have wanted her to, and since I myself fashioned my own dishonor." Volume 1, Chapter 35, pg. 247

Quote 20: "You have won, my lovely Dorotea, you have won. How could anyone deny such a weight of truth?" Volume 1, Chapter 36, pg. 251

Quote 21: "I do not give it to you so you may kiss it, but rather so you may see how its sinews are structured, its muscles knitted together, the breadth and capacity of its veins, from all of which you should be able to calculate the strength of the arm which has such a hand." Volume 1, Chapter 43, pg. 301

Quote 22: "[S]o you'll simply have to resign yourself -- you, and your ass, too -- to the sad fact that this is indeed a decorative harness and not a saddlebag, and your case has been singularly badly argued and substantiated." Volume 1, Chapter 45, pg. 311

Quote 23: "[K]nights errant are exempt from the application of all laws and statutes, that for them law is their sword, statutes are their spirit, and edicts and proclamations are their will and desire." Volume 1, Chapter 45, pg. 314

Quote 24: "'No one's gotten me pregnant'...'and I'm not the kind of man who lets himself get pregnant, not even by the king, and though I may be poor, I'm an Old Christian...'" Volume 1, Chapter 47, pg. 325

Quote 25: "Ah, ah, now I understand you, Sancho! Oh yes, lots of times, and I feel it coming right now. Get me out of this pickle, because it's already pretty messy in here!" Volume 1, Chapter 49, pg. 333

Quote 26: "I think and believe that I'm enchanted, and this satisfies my conscience, for it would weigh heavily upon me, if I believed I wasn't enchanted and had let myself be locked up in this crate like a lazy coward." Volume 1, Chapter 49, pg. 333

Quote 27: "...to get rid of the disgust and nausea caused by this other Don Quijote." Volume 2, Dedication, pg. 359

Quote 28: "'You think it's easy...swelling up a dog like that?'...'Do you think it's easy, your grace, making a book?'" Volume 2, Prologue, pg. 361

Quote 29: "'Mine, Sir Scraper and Shaver,' said Don Quijote, 'would be sensible, not senseless.'" Volume 2, Chapter 1, pg. 363

Quote 30: "[A]nd I, for all that, will stay in my asylum, if there's no chaplain to take me out of it, and if that Jupiter, as the barber tells us, won't rain, well, here I am, and I'll rain whenever I want to. Which I say because I want Mr. Barber-Basin to know I understand him." Volume 2, Chapter 1, pg. 368

Quote 31: "Blessings on Sidi Hamid Benengeli, who has left us your magnificence's history, and even more blessings on the inquiring mind responsible for translating that history from Arabic into our native Castillian, for the universal entertainment of all peoples." Volume 2, Chapter 3, pg. 375

Quote 32: "[Y]ou think you're brave and courageous, when you're really old; you think you're strong, when you're really feeble; you think you can go righting wrongs when age has bent you in half -- and, above all, that you're a knight, when you're not, because even though gentlemen can become knights, poor ones can't!" Volume 2, Chapter 6, pg. 390

Quote 33: "'And I'll bet,' said Sancho, 'you got it right away...but you wanted to get me all bothered, so you could hear me make a couple of dozen more mistakes.'
'That's possible,' replied Don Quijote." Volume 2, Chapter 7, pg. 394

Quote 34: "[A]lthough it's true I'm pretty clever, and I'm something of a rascal, but all that's well hidden under this always easy and natural disguise of behaving like a fool." Volume 2, Chapter 8, pg. 399

Quote 35: "[F]or land that's dry and unfruitful will give you good crops, if you put on enough manure...I mean, your grace's words have been like manure spread on the barren ground of my dry and uncultivated mind." Volume 2, Chapter 12, pg. 418

Quote 36: "I tell you, when it comes to asking stupid questions and giving crazy answers, I don't need to go looking for help from my neighbors." Volume 2, Chapter 22, pg. 476

Quote 37: "[I]f not, oh my cousin, what I say is: patience, and shuffle the cards." Volume 2, Chapter 23, pg. 482

Quote 38: "Tell me, you brand-new buffoon and thoroughly ancient pest." Volume 2, Chapter 31, pg. 523

Quote 39: "'By God and my conscience,' responded the Devil, 'I paid no attention to him, for my mind was so busy with so many things that, for the moment, I'd almost forgotten what I was up to.'"
'Clearly,' said Sancho, 'this devil must be both a good man and a good Christian, or he'd never have sworn "By God and my conscience," I begin to see that, even in Hell, there must be decent people.'" Volume 2, Chapter 34, pg. 545

Quote 40: "What the hell has my ass got to do with magic?" Volume 2, Chapter 35, pg. 549

Quote 41: "[B]ut if the rice is already boiling, don't stir it up, even if it's getting sticky." Volume 2, Chapter 37, pg. 558

Quote 42: "'[A]s Sancho says, silence is golden.'
'That must be some other Sancho,' said Don Quijote." Volume 2, Chapter 43, pg. 584

Quote 43: "[J]okers find that they're the ones being fooled." Volume 2, Chapter 49, pg. 615

Quote 44: "[S]o I have had to pay in spades for my vanity, because I ought to have understood that my feeble Rocinante could never withstand a horse so immensely strong as the Knight of the White Moon's." Volume 2, Chapter 66, pg. 709

Quote 45: "[A]nd since in all this the fault is yours, your grace, you ought to punish yourself, instead of venting your anger on this armor...and you shouldn't blame it on Rocinante's meek, mild ways, or even on the softness of my feet." Volume 2, Chapter 66, pg. 710

Quote 46:"...that what applies here is the old saying about the pot calling the kettle black." Volume 2, Chapter 67, pg 716

Quote 47: "...and bless the man who invented sleep, a cloak to cover over all human thought, food that drives away hunger, water that banishes thirst, fire that heats up cold, chill that moderates passion and, finally universal currency with which all things can be bought, weight and balance that brings the shepherd and the king, the fool and the wise, to the same level." Volume 2, Chapter 68, pg. 717

Quote 48: "...that wouldn't be so bad, if I have to cure the world's problems by being everybody's scapegoat." Volume 2, Chapter 69, pg. 724

Quote 49: "...conjuring up images of anyone she thinks she loves." Volume 2, Chapter 70, pg. 729

Quote 50: "...has won the battle with himself, and that according to what he's told me, is the greatest victory anyone could want." Chapter 72, pg. 737

Quote 51: "I am in my right mind, now, clear-headed and free of the murky darkness of ignorance, brought upon me by my continual, bitter reading of those abominable books of chivalry." Volume 2, Chapter 74, pg. 742