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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. People who pass through Des Moines are only stopping to get _____, according to Bryson.
(a) A hotel room.
(b) Water.
(c) Food.
(d) Gas.

2. What does Bryson first notice when crossing the line to North Carolina?
(a) The landscape improves.
(b) The change in weather.
(c) The influx of billboards.
(d) The strange smell.

3. When Bryson's car begins to skid, what noise does he make?
(a) A thunderstorm.
(b) A rollercoaster.
(c) A baby crying.
(d) Tarzan missing the vine.

4. Bryson feels that Columbus has pieces of _______.
(a) Perfection.
(b) His childhood.
(c) History.
(d) Fantasy.

5. Bryson says he "wouldn't hesitate to give an old person a shove, especially a _______."
(a) Woman.
(b) Baptist.
(c) Rude one.
(d) Southerner.

6. According to Bryson's generalization, where will people from Des Moines work?
(a) Ford.
(b) The hospital.
(c) The grocery store.
(d) Firestone.

7. What does Bryson tell the waitress he has just gotten out of prison for?
(a) Robbing a restaurant.
(b) Killing a pushy waitress.
(c) Poisoning customers.
(d) Killing a farmer.

8. What does Bryson claim is good about Des Moines in comparison the rest of Iowa?
(a) Famous people pass through.
(b) It has a nicer scenery.
(c) It is wealthier and better educated.
(d) It's less expensive.

9. When a girl asks Bryson "kin I help yew," how does Bryson feel?
(a) Like he's falling in love.
(b) Embarrassed for her.
(c) Like he's in another country.
(d) Like he's in danger.

10. In Tupelo, which famous home does Bryson visit?
(a) Billy the Kid's.
(b) Doris Day's.
(c) Elvis's.
(d) Jack London's.

11. Bryson states that people who pass through Des Moines and stay for years are confused, but _____ in their decision.
(a) Unaffected.
(b) Angry.
(c) Serene.
(d) Hostile.

12. The Dullard barmaid has "ready for sex written all over her face but better bring a _____ written all over her body."
(a) Paper bag.
(b) Bouquet of flowers.
(c) Fire extinguisher.
(d) Hamburger.

13. What would Bryson need in order to bring a souvenir home from Bryson City?
(a) A bigger trunk.
(b) A crowbar.
(c) More money.
(d) More gas.

14. Why were Bryson's family vacations always so dingy?
(a) Because it made the trip more exciting.
(b) Because the midwest is dingy.
(c) Because they were trying to save money.
(d) Because no one cared either way.

15. Bryson finds that most items advertised in the New York Times are _____.
(a) Expensive.
(b) Fancy.
(c) Fake.
(d) Junk.

Short Answer Questions

1. After visiting Cherokee and Gatlinburg, in Bryson's opinion, what do Americans think it is necessary to do to a place?

2. What awes Bryson about Savannah?

3. What does Bryson say he, like all midwesterners, love?

4. Why does Bryson stop in Bryson City?

5. Why has Bryson never seen the "Ripley's Believe It Or Not Museum"?

(see the answer keys)

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