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Chapters One through Three

• Sellevision host Max Andrews is fired after his penis is accidentally exposed during a live broadcast for children.

• Another Sellevision host named Peggy Jean Smythe receives e-mails from a "fan" telling her that she has hairy earlobes and a deep voice.

• Host Bebe Friedman runs a personal ad on the internet, to which she receives a promising response.

• Howard Toast, executive producer and married man, is having an affair with host Leigh Bushmoore.

• Peggy Jean believes that "female problems" are the cause of her hairy earlobes and deep voice.

Chapters Four through Six

• Host Trish Mission's father buys her a 7.5 carat engagement ring because he feels the one she received from her fiancé is too small.

• Peggy Jean's husband John arranges to be alone with their teenage neighbor Nikki.

• Peggy Jean continues to receive rude, critical e-mails from her "fan."

• Max's future in shopping...

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