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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What did the narrator write as his favorite profession when he was in eighth grade?
(a) Lawyer.
(b) Doctor.
(c) Writer.
(d) Actor.

2. What does the Monkey threaten to do if the narrator won't marry her?
(a) Shoot herself.
(b) Jump off the balcony.
(c) Leave him.
(d) Kill him.

3. Where is the Monkey from?
(a) Kentucky.
(b) West Virginia.
(c) Arkansas.
(d) Mississippi.

4. What does the Monkey say that she hates on their drive back?
(a) The car.
(b) The south.
(c) Vermont.
(d) New York.

5. What does the narrator say that he and the Monkey took back to their hotel in Rome?
(a) A dog.
(b) A cat.
(c) A married couple.
(d) A prostitute.

6. Where did the narrator go on a trip with the Monkey?
(a) Idaho.
(b) Kentucky.
(c) Vermont.
(d) Israel.

7. Where was Kay from?
(a) Louisiana.
(b) Illinois.
(c) Missouri.
(d) Iowa.

8. Why does the narrator go to Irvington Park to ice skate?
(a) To watch shikses.
(b) It's by his house.
(c) To play with friends.
(d) His sister takes him.

9. What does the narrator's father warn Morty that he'll turn his son into?
(a) A Communist.
(b) A Republican.
(c) A Goy.
(d) A Shikse.

10. What does Bubbles call the narrator before he leaves?
(a) "Kid."
(b) "Kike."
(c) "Nazi."
(d) "Jerk."

11. What is the name of the radio play the narrator writes in his youth?
(a) Shikse's Revenge.
(b) Songs of Communism.
(c) Free and Brave.
(d) Let Freedom Ring!

12. What will "take you for all you're worth and leave you in the gutter," according to the protagonist's parents?
(a) A wife.
(b) A Jewish girl.
(c) A blondie.
(d) A prostitute.

13. What was the narrator's IQ at age 12?
(a) 143.
(b) 158.
(c) 124.
(d) 176.

14. What kind of car did the narrator and Monkey rent on their trip?
(a) A station-wagon.
(b) A convertable.
(c) A truck.
(d) A sedan.

15. Who was the narrator's favorite "hero" in eighth grade?
(a) George Washington.
(b) Mrs. Portnoy.
(c) Abraham Lincoln.
(d) Dr. Woolverstein.

Short Answer Questions

1. What color hair does the character Naomi have?

2. What does the narrator nickname the owner of the local candy store at the Sunday rituals?

3. What does the protagonist worry he will catch from Bubbles?

4. What does the narrator say that his Rabbi smelled like?

5. What phrase does the narrator say he never said before his trip with the college girlfriend?

(see the answer keys)

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