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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What did Ellen say she chanted when she flew?
(a) I am going to die.
(b) Please make it stop.
(c) This is Hell.
(d) Stay in the sky.

2. How old was Ellen when she moved away from Metairie?
(a) 6.
(b) 7.
(c) 8.
(d) 5.

3. What did Ellen's friend's nickname used to be?
(a) Miss Much.
(b) Hail Mary.
(c) Large Marge.
(d) Fatty Patty.

4. What did Ellen mistake for a crash dive on a plane?
(a) A cell phone ringing.
(b) A rattling drink.
(c) A bit of turbulence.
(d) The intercom static.

5. What ingredient is needed for Ellen's recipe?
(a) Eggs.
(b) All of these.
(c) Butter.
(d) Flour.

6. Where did Ellen go to High School?
(a) Tennessee.
(b) Texas.
(c) Georgia.
(d) Florida.

7. How was Ellen's brother treated differently than she was?
(a) There were pictures taken of him.
(b) He was allowed to take sports classes.
(c) He was held and cuddled.
(d) His friends were welcomed in the home.

8. How does Ellen say she proves she is a girl?
(a) She orders dessesrt.
(b) She is short.
(c) She goes to the women's restroom.
(d) She has PMS.

9. What did Ellen compare herself to when she needed a hobby?
(a) A river.
(b) A tree.
(c) A bug.
(d) A car.

10. How does Ellen say children should learn about sex?
(a) Watch a live birth.
(b) Go to the theater.
(c) Watch cable.
(d) Read a book.

11. How many things are talked about in Chapter 11?
(a) 4.
(b) 10.
(c) 8.
(d) 6.

12. What is the name of the friend Ellen sent a letter to?
(a) Morgana.
(b) Missy.
(c) Morgan.
(d) Maria.

13. What does Ellen say inspired TV in the 60s?
(a) Sex.
(b) Alcohol.
(c) Music.
(d) Drugs.

14. What does Ellen never wear?
(a) Skirts.
(b) Shoes.
(c) Socks.
(d) Pants.

15. How old was the person celebrating the party in Chapter 2?
(a) 70.
(b) 60.
(c) 80.
(d) 90.

Short Answer Questions

1. What does Ellen say about bathing in Chapter 11?

2. Why does Ellen think a certain kind of shoe should be outlawed?

3. What did Ellen ask a nun on a plane to do for her?

4. Where did the Iditarod start?

5. What did Ellen say she used to win the race?

(see the answer keys)

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