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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. How long does it take the police to get the Dunbars home after Jocelyn calls them?
(a) 25 minutes.
(b) 26 minutes.
(c) 24 minutes.
(d) 27 minutes.

2. What did Sedaris see someone dressed as and handing out leaflets on Lexington Avenue?
(a) Hot dog.
(b) Dog.
(c) Taco.
(d) Camcorder.

3. Sedaris discovers while working at the cafeteria that most people are what?
(a) Smart.
(b) Frightened.
(c) Kind.
(d) Lazy.

4. How old is Kyle Dunbar?
(a) 12.
(b) 13.
(c) 15.
(d) 14.

5. Where did Sedaris apply for a job the day before seeing the SanatLand ad?
(a) U.S. Army.
(b) UPS.
(c) Mary Kay.
(d) FedEx.

6. What does Khe Sahn wear to the Dunbar Thanksgiving dinner?
(a) Plastic bags.
(b) Bikini.
(c) Nothing.
(d) Silk slip.

7. Everything about the_______ intimidates Sedaris in SantaLand.
(a) Elf costume.
(b) Cash register.
(c) Holiday season.
(d) Children.

8. In a previous interview, Sedaris said he liked the ________.
(a) Pay.
(b) Perks.
(c) Uniforms.
(d) Car.

9. What is the name of Jackelyn Dunbar's husband?
(a) John.
(b) Timothy.
(c) Todd.
(d) Joey.

10. What is Kevin Dunbar majoring in at college?
(a) Pre-Law.
(b) Chemical engineering.
(c) Vietnamese history.
(d) Pre-med.

11. Where does Kevin Dunbar go to college?
(a) Fresno State.
(b) Freeman College.
(c) Feeny State.
(d) Feesy College.

12. What is the only thing they sell in SantaLand?
(a) Posters.
(b) Photos.
(c) Toys.
(d) Candy canes.

13. What day does Khe Sahn arrive at the Dunbar home?
(a) Halloween.
(b) Christmas Eve.
(c) Groundhog Day.
(d) Thanksgiving.

14. In "Socrates and Company," Sedaris would travel the world with a _________.
(a) Dog.
(b) Entourage.
(c) Monkey.
(d) Cat.

15. One afternoon they set a record at SantaLand by getting _______ people through in one hour.
(a) 1000.
(b) 600.
(c) 1400.
(d) 1200.

Short Answer Questions

1. In "Dinah, the Christmas Whore" Sedaris compares mall shoppers to what?

2. Where is Khe Sahn from?

3. According to Sedaris, Sallie Mae is located where?

4. Sedaris compares Sallie Mae to a __________.

5. What is the first name of Khe Sahn Dunbar's interpreter?

(see the answer keys)

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