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This test consists of 15 multiple choice questions and 5 short answer questions.

Multiple Choice Questions

1. What does the narrator say the maid smells like?
(a) Bacon fat
(b) Wine
(c) Cheap perfume
(d) Liquid detergent

2. What have pollutants made beautiful in New Jersey?
(a) The grass
(b) The stars
(c) Sunsets
(d) Women

3. What do the boys throw at the church door?
(a) Sticks
(b) Bottles
(c) Appless
(d) Rocks

4. What does it say on front of the girlfriend's t-shirt?
(a) No Problem
(b) Come Here
(c) Peel Me
(d) Hate Me

5. What should you talk to an outside girl about?
(a) Homelife
(b) School
(c) Art and literature
(d) Aspirations

6. What country has Lou traveled to for an operation?
(a) Britain
(b) USA
(c) Russia
(d) Canada

7. What did Papi take a bus to when he left Miami?
(a) Mississippi
(b) North Carolina
(c) Virginia
(d) New York

8. What is Yunior's father's first name?
(a) Ramon
(b) Carlos
(c) Diego
(d) Ysrael

9. What does Ysrael look for outside of the bars?
(a) Food
(b) Newspapers
(c) Coins
(d) Comics

10. What is the only thing a local girl will allow you to do?
(a) Tickle her
(b) Massage her
(c) Touch her
(d) Kiss her

11. How does Yunior say the girlfriend's hair makes her look?
(a) Fun
(b) Sweet
(c) Laidback
(d) Fierce

12. What does Yunior think the couple do for a living?
(a) Drug dealing
(b) Acting
(c) Modelling
(d) Journalism

13. What do people shout at Ysrael?
(a) No face
(b) Freak
(c) Horror show
(d) Pig victim

14. What city does Papi fly to?
(a) Newark
(b) New York
(c) Los Angeles
(d) Miami

15. What does the fat boy say he going to make Ysrael into?
(a) A corpse
(b) A girl
(c) A pig
(d) A flea

Short Answer Questions

1. Which housemate does Papi like the least?

2. What exercises does Papi like to do?

3. What does Ysrael buy after his lessons?

4. What should you never lose on the first date?

5. Where does Yunior say to put the basket with all the crapped on toilet paper?

(see the answer keys)

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