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1. How does the author characterize an affair?

An affair is a breach of trust. It does not need to include sexual intercourse, only intimate behaviors that occur between a married partner and a non-marital partner. The breach of trust results in deep feelings of betrayal.

2. What steps does the author take to minimize emotionally-charged labels associated with the affair?

The author describes the person in the marriage who is involved in the affair as the unfaithful partner. The person in the marriage not involved in the affair is referred to as the hurt partner. The extramarital person is termed the lover. These labels are intended to be more neutral have less potential emotional reaction, than the more common labels of victim, victimizer, betrayed, or betrayer.

3. For whom is the book primarily written?

The book is written primarily for couples who have already disclosed the existence of an extramarital affair and have decided to recommit to the marriage. The book does not offer judgments on whether or not an affair is good or bad, nor if all couples should stay together or divorce following the disclosure of an affair. Instead, the book is targeted to couples who have already made these decisions together.

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