“Every time I think of all that you robbed me of, I—­I—­” began Mr. Smilk, shakily.

“Don’t blubber, Cassius,” said Mr. Yollop consolingly.  “You see, my dear Alice, Mr. Smilk thinks,—­and maintains,—­that you did him a dirty trick when you had him turned out into a wicked, dishonest world.  He was living on the fat of the land up there in Sing Sing, seeing motion pictures and plays and so forth, without a worry in the world, with union hours and union pay, no one depending—­”

“What nonsense are you talking?  How could he have union pay in a penitentiary, Crittenden?”

“Don’t interrupt me, please.  However, I will explain that he was just as well-off at the end of the week as any union laborer is, and no street car fare to pay besides.  Free food, fuel, lodging, divorce, music—­”

“I forgot to mention baseball,” interrupted Mr. Smilk.  “And once in awhile an electrocution to break the monotony, to say nothin’ of a jail-break every now and then.  Say, you’ll have to get a move on, Mrs. Champney,—­God, will I ever forget that name!—­’cause we’re expectin’ the police here before long.  I’ve changed my mind about havin’ you hold your hands up, Mr. Yollop.  You made me telephone for the police to come around and arrest me.  Now I’m goin’ to make you bind and gag this lady.  I can’t very well do it myself and keep you covered at the same time, and while I ought to give you a wollop on the jaw, same as you done to me, I ain’t goin’ to do it.  You can scream if you want to, ma’am,—­yell ‘bloody murder’, and ‘police’, and everything.  It’s all the same to me.  Go ahead and—­”

“It is not my intention to do anything of the kind,” announced the lady haughtily.  “But I want to tell you one thing, Crittenden Yollop.  If you attempt to gag and bind me, I’ll bite and scratch, even if you are my own brother.”

Mr. Yollop pondered.  “I think, Cassius, if you don’t mind, I’d rather you’d hit me a good sound wollop on the jaw.”

“I’ll tell you what I’ll do,” modified Mr. Smilk.  “I’ll lock you in that closet over there, Mr. Yollop, so’s you won’t have to watch me rap her over the bean.  After I’ve gone through the apartment, I’ll—­”

“Would you strike a woman, Ernest Wilson?” cried Mrs. Champney.

“See here, Smilk,” said Mr. Yollop, “I cannot allow you to strike my sister.  If you so much as lay a finger on her, I’ll thrash you within an inch of your life.”

“Oh, you will, will you?” sneered Mr. Smilk.

“If you want to go ahead and rob this apartment in a decent, orderly way, all well and good.  My sister and I will personally conduct you through,—­”

“We will do nothing of the kind,” blazed Mrs. Champney.

“I’d like to see you try to thrash me within an inch—­”

“And, what’s more,” went on the lady, “I will see that you go up for twenty years, Ernest Wilson, you degraded, ungrateful wretch.”

Smilk’s face brightened.  He even allowed himself a foxy grin.