some of your great folks look pretty streaked—he’s
a true patriot and statesman, the first in our country,
and a most particular cute Lawyer. There was a
Quaker chap too cute for him once tho’.
This Quaker, a pretty knowin’ old shaver, had
a cause down to Rhode Island; so he went to Daniel
to hire him to go down and plead his case for him;
so says he, Lawyer Webster what’s your fee?
Why, says Daniel, let me see, I have to go down south
to Washington, to plead the great Insurance case of
the Hartford Company—and I’ve got
to be at Cincinnati to attend the Convention, and
I don’t see how I can go to Rhode Island without
great loss and great fatigue; it would cost you may
be more than you’d be willing to give.
Well, the Quaker looked pretty white about the gills,
I tell you, when he heard this, for he could not do
without him no how, and he did not like this preliminary
talk of his at all—at last he made bold
to ask him the worst of it, what he would take; why,
says Daniel, I always liked the Quakers, they are
a quiet peaceable people who never go to law if they
can help it, and it would be better for our great
country if there were more such people in it.
I never seed or heerd tell of any harm in em except
going the whole figure for Gineral Jackson, and that
everlastin almighty villain, Van Buren; yes, I love
the Quakers, I hope they’ll go the Webster ticket
yet—and I’ll go for you as low as
I can any way afford, say 1,000 dollars. The
Quaker well nigh fainted when he heerd this, but he
was pretty deep too: so, says he, Lawyer, that’s
a great deal of money, but I have more causes there,
if I give you the 1000 dollars will you plead the
other cases I shall have to give you? Yes, says
Daniel, I will to the best of my humble abilities;
so down they went to Rhode Island, and Daniel tried
the case and carried it for the Quaker. Well,
the Quaker he goes round to all the folks that had
suits in court, and says he what will you give me
if I get the great Daniel to plead for you? It
cost me 1000 dollars for a fee, but now he and I are
pretty thick, and as he is on the spot, I’d get
him to plead cheap for you—so he got three
hundred dollars from one, and two from another and
so on, until he got eleven hundred dollars, jist one
hundred dollars more than he gave. Daniel was
in a great rage when he heerd this; what, said he,
do you think I would agree to your letting me out
like a horse to hire? Friend Daniel, said the
Quaker, didst thou not undertake to plead all such
cases as I should have to give thee? If thou
wilt not stand to thy agreement, neither will I stand
to mine. Daniel laughed out ready to split his
sides at this. Well, says he, I guess I might
as well stand still for you to put the bridle on this
time, for you have fairly pinned me up in a corner
of the fence any how—so he went good humouredly
to work and pleaded them all.