Carriage after carriage, laden with tourists and trunks, arrived, and the quiet hotel was soon populous.  We were early at the table d’ho^te and saw the people all come in.  There were twenty-five, perhaps.  They were of various nationalities, but we were the only Americans.  Next to me sat an English bride, and next to her sat her new husband, whom she called “Neddy,” though he was big enough and stalwart enough to be entitled to his full name.  They had a pretty little lovers’ quarrel over what wine they should have.  Neddy was for obeying the guide-book and taking the wine of the country; but the bride said: 

“What, that nahsty stuff!”

“It isn’t nahsty, pet, it’s quite good.”

“It is nahsty.”

“No, it isn’t nahsty.”

“It’s Oful nahsty, Neddy, and I shahn’t drink it.”

Then the question was, what she must have.  She said he knew very well that she never drank anything but champagne.

She added: 

“You know very well papa always has champagne on his table, and I’ve always been used to it.”

Neddy made a playful pretense of being distressed about the expense, and this amused her so much that she nearly exhausted herself with laughter—­and this pleased him so much that he repeated his jest a couple of times, and added new and killing varieties to it.  When the bride finally recovered, she gave Neddy a love-box on the arm with her fan, and said with arch severity: 

“Well, you would have me—­nothing else would do —­so you’ll have to make the best of a bad bargain.  Do order the champagne, I’m Oful dry.”

So with a mock groan which made her laugh again,
Neddy ordered the champagne.

The fact that this young woman had never moistened the selvedge edge of her soul with a less plebeian tipple than champagne, had a marked and subduing effect on Harris.  He believed she belonged to the royal family.  But I had my doubts.

We heard two or three different languages spoken by people at the table and guessed out the nationalities of most of the guests to our satisfaction, but we failed with an elderly gentleman and his wife and a young girl who sat opposite us, and with a gentleman of about thirty-five who sat three seats beyond Harris.  We did not hear any of these speak.  But finally the last-named gentleman left while we were not noticing, but we looked up as he reached the far end of the table.  He stopped there a moment, and made his toilet with a pocket comb.  So he was a German; or else he had lived in German hotels long enough to catch the fashion.  When the elderly couple and the young girl rose to leave, they bowed respectfully to us.  So they were Germans, too.  This national custom is worth six of the other one, for export.