(1) Certain abstinences, that might not seem in themselves important, are necessary.  Little familiarities, kisses and caresses, must be avoided; they are a playing with fire; and the youth never knows when the electric thrill will vibrate through his being, awakened by a touch, that will summon him to a new world wherein he must not yet enter.  The finest men do not take these liberties, nor do well-bred girls permit them or respect those who seek them.  Vulgar jokes and stories must be despised, as well as all allusions to vice as a natural or amusing thing.  Alcohol, gambling, and all unhealthy excitements must be shunned.  Above all, the imagination must be controlled; nothing is more dangerous than the indulgence in voluptuous dreams.  Longings so fostered, so pent up without outlet, are too apt to break out, in despite of scruples and resolves, if a favorable and alluring opportunity occurs.  The battle against sin is won more in private than in the actual moments of temptation.

(2) But in this matter, as always, we must not merely avoid evil, we must overcome evil with good; we can best hope to escape the sirens not as Ulysses did, by having himself bound to the mast, but as Orpheus did, by playing a sweeter music still than they.  The best antidote to impurity is a pure love, the next best the dedication to a love yet to be found.  The passionate youth must speak in the vein of the Knight in Santayana’s poem: 

“As the gaudy shadows Stalked by me which men take for beauteous things, I laughed to scorn each feeble counterfeit, And cried to the sweet image in my soul, How much more bright thou wast and beautiful.”

Normal friendships with pure girls are vitally necessary for a man, and comradeship with men important for women.  Normal interests of all sorts are necessary; the man or woman who has a full, all-round life, who cultivates wholesome intellectual, aesthetic, religious activities, is in far less danger of an unregulated passion.  Human energy must find some happy outlets, or it will tend to run amuck; what we become depends largely on what we get interested in.  In particular, the abundant physical activity of robust health makes it much easier to banish immoderate desires.

(3) There are certain safeguards that the community should erect. (a) Among these are the conventions that control intimacy between the sexes.  On the one hand, the wholesome comradeship of boys and girls, above desiderated, must be encouraged, not only for the removal of that loneliness and morbid curiosity which are among the greatest of sex irritants, but in order that husband and wife may be wisely chosen.  On the other hand, the attractiveness of the other sex may easily draw too much attention from the studies and sports that ought to make up the bulk of the activity of youth; and too great freedom of companionship leads to an unnecessary amount of temptation.  The fearless, heart-free friendship of chaste youths and maidens is a priceless boon.  But close lines must be drawn, and a certain amount of wise chaperonage is necessary.  Too free a physical intimacy between the sexes leads almost irresistibly on, with many, to actual intercourse; the instinct is too imperious to be withstood when opportunity is too easy, if there are not many barriers to be broken first.