Unfortunately Behrisch, and we through him, had a certain other propensity for some girls who were better than their reputation,—­by which our own reputation could not be improved.  We had often been seen in their garden; and we directed our walks thither, even when the young count was with us.  All this may have been treasured up, and at last communicated to his father:  enough, he sought, in a gentlemanly manner, to get rid of the tutor, to whom the event proved fortunate.  His good exterior, his knowledge and talents, his integrity, which no one could call in question, had won him the affection and esteem of distinguished persons, on whose recommendation he was appointed tutor to the hereditary prince of Dessau, and at the court of a prince, excellent in every respect, found a solid happiness.

The loss of a friend like Behrisch was of the greatest consequence to me.  He had spoiled while he cultivated me; and his presence was necessary, if the pains he had thought good to spend upon me were in any degree to bring forth fruit for society.  He knew how to engage me in all kinds of pretty and agreeable things, in whatever was just appropriate, and to bring out my social talents.  But as I had gained no self-dependence in such things, so when I was alone again I immediately relapsed into my confused and crabbed disposition, which always increased, the more discontented I was with those about me, since I fancied that they were not contented with me.  With the most arbitrary caprice, I took offence at what I might have considered an advantage; thus alienated many with whom I had hitherto been on a tolerable footing; and on account of the many disagreeable consequences which I had drawn on myself and others, whether by doing or leaving undone, by doing too much or too little, was obliged to hear the remark from my well-wishers, that I lacked experience.  The same thing was told me by every person of sound sense who saw my productions, especially when these referred to the external world.  I observed this as well as I could, but found in it little that was edifying, and was still forced to add enough of my own to make it only tolerable.  I had often pressed my friend Behrisch, too, that he would make plain to me what was meant by experience?  But, because he was full of nonsense, he put me off with fair words from one day to another, and at last, after great preparations, disclosed to me, that true experience was properly when one experiences how an experienced nvan must experience in experiencing his experience.  Now, when we scolded him outrageously, and called him to account for this, he assured us that a great mystery lay hidden behind these words, which we could not comprehend until we had experienced ...and so on without end,—­for it cost him nothing to talk on in that way by the quarter of an hour,—­since the experience would always become more experienced and at last come to true experience.  When we were about to despair at such fooleries, he protested that he had learned this way of making himself intelligible and impressive from the latest and greatest authors, who had made us observe how one can rest a restful rest, and how silence, in being silent, can constantly become more silent.