GILBEY. [overwhelmed] Maria:  did you understand him to say his brother was a duke?

MRS GILBEY.  Fancy his condescending!  Perhaps if youd offer to raise his wages and treat him as one of the family, he’d stay.

GILBEY.  And have my own servant above me!  Not me.  Whats the world coming to?  Heres Bobby and—­

JUGGINS. [entering and announcing] Mr and Mrs Knox.

The Knoxes come in.  Juggins takes two chairs from the wall and places them at the table, between the host and hostess.  Then he withdraws.

MRS GILBEY. [to Mrs Knox] How are you, dear?

MRS KNOX.  Nicely, thank you.  Good evening, Mr Gilbey. [They shake hands; and she takes the chair nearest Mrs Gilbey.  Mr Knox takes the other chair].

GILBEY. [sitting down] I was just saying, Knox, What is the world coming to?

KNOX. [appealing to his wife] What was I saying myself only this morning?

MRS KNOX.  This is a strange time.  I was never one to talk about the end of the world; but look at the things that have happened!

KNOX.  Earthquakes!

GILBEY.  San Francisco!

MRS GILBEY.  Jamaica!

KNOX.  Martinique!

GILBEY.  Messina!

MRS GILBEY.  The plague in China!

MRS KNOX.  The floods in France!

GILBEY.  My Bobby in Wormwood Scrubbs!

KNOX.  Margaret in Holloway!

GILBEY.  And now my footman tells me his brother’s a duke!

KNOX.       |   No!
|
MRS KNOX.   | Whats that?

GILBEY.  Just before he let you in.  A duke!  Here has everything been respectable from the beginning of the world, as you may say, to the present day; and all of a sudden everything is turned upside down.

MRS KNOX.  It’s like in the book of Revelations.  But I do say that unless people have happiness within themselves, all the earthquakes, all the floods, and all the prisons in the world cant make them really happy.

KNOX.  It isnt alone the curious things that are happening, but the unnatural way people are taking them.  Why, theres Margaret been in prison, and she hasnt time to go to all the invitations shes had from people that never asked her before.

GILBEY.  I never knew we could live without being respectable.

MRS GILBEY.  Oh, Rob, what a thing to say!  Who says we’re not respectable?

GILBEY.  Well, it’s not what I call respectable to have your children in and out of gaol.

KNOX.  Oh come, Gilbey! we’re not tramps because weve had, as it were, an accident.

GILBEY.  It’s no use, Knox:  look it in the face.  Did I ever tell you my father drank?

KNOX.  No.  But I knew it.  Simmons told me.

GILBEY.  Yes:  he never could keep his mouth quiet:  he told me your aunt was a kleptomaniac.

MRS KNOX.  It wasnt true, Mr Gilbey.  She used to pick up handkerchiefs if she saw them lying about; but you might trust her with untold silver.