run such risks to obtain thy paltry leaves from India, except for Mammon’s sake?  And only for him what king would receive them, especially into Britain, and who but for his sake would carry them to every part of the kingdom?  Yet how worthless thou too wouldst be, Mammon, if Pride did not lavish thee upon fair mansions, fine clothes, needless lawsuits, gardens and horses, extravagant relatives, numerous dishes, floods of beer and ale, beyond the power and station of their owner; for if money were spent within the limit of necessity and of becoming moderation, what would Mammon avail us?  Thus thou art nought without Pride; and little would Pride profit without Wantonness, for bastards are the most numerous and the most fierce of all the subjects of my daughter Pride.  And thou, Asmodai, what wouldst thou profit us were it not for Sloth and Idleness?  Where wouldst thou obtain a night’s lodging?  Thou wouldst not dare expect it from a laborer or diligent student.  And who, for the dishonor and the shame, would ever give thee, Belphegor the Slothful, a moment’s welcome, if Hypocrisy did not disguise thy foulness under the name of an internal disease, or as a good intent or a seeming despisal of wealth or the like.  She too—­my dear daughter Hypocrisy—­what good is or ever would she be, notwithstanding her skill as a seamstress, and her boldness, without thy aid, my eldest brother, Beelzebub, great chief of Distraction:  if he gave people peace and leisure to reflect seriously upon the nature of things and their differences, how long would it take them to find holes in the folds of Hypocrisy’s golden garments, and to see the hooks through the bait?  What man in his senses would gather together toys and fleeting pleasures, surfeiting, vain and disgraceful, and choose them in preference to a calm conscience and the bliss of a glorious eternity?  Who would refuse to suffer the pangs of martyrdom for his faith for an hour or a day, or affliction for forty or sixty years, if he considered that his neighbours suffer here in an hour more than he could suffer on earth for ever.  Tobacco is nothing without Money, or Money without Pride, and Pride is but a weakling without Wantonness, nor is Wantonness aught without Sloth, nor Sloth without Hypocrisy, nor Hypocrisy without Thoughtlessness.  Wherefore, now,” said Lucifer, lifting his infernal hoofs on their claw-ends, “to give my own opinion:  however excellent all these may be, I have a friend better suited than all to our foe of Britain.”  Then could I see all the archfiends open wide their horrid mouths upon Lucifer in eager expectation as to what this could possibly be, while I too was as anxious as they.  “A friend,” continued Lucifer, “whose true worth I have too long neglected, just as thou, Satan, tempting Job of yore, didst foolishly turn upon him with severity.  This, my kinswoman, I now appoint regent in all matters appertaining to my kingdom on earth, next to myself.  Her name is Prosperity: