The barber spent much time in opening his case, and preparing his razors:  instead of putting water into the bason, he took a very handsome astrolabe out of his budget, and went very gravely out of my room to the middle of the yard to take the height of the sun; then he returned with the same grave pace, and, entering my room, Sir, said he, you will be pleased to know this day is Friday the 18th of the month Saffar, in the year 653, [Footnote:  This year 653 is one of the Hegira, the common epocha of the Mahometans, and answers to the year 1255, from the nativity of Christ; from whence we may conjecture that these computations were made in Arabia about that time.] from the retreat of our great prophet from Mecca to Medina, and in the year 7320 [Footnote:  As for the year 7320, the author is mistaken in that computation.  The year 653 of the Hegira, and the 1255 of Christ, coincide only with the 1557 of the aera or the epocha of the Selucides, which is the same with that of Alexander the Great, who is called Iskender with two horns, according to the expression of the Arabians.] of the epocha of the great Iskender with two horns; and that the conjunction of Mars and Mercury signifies you cannot choose a better time than this very day for being shaved.  But, on the other hand, the same conjunction is a bad presage to you.  I learn from thence, that this day you run a great risk, not indeed of losing your life, but of an inconvenience which will attend you while you live.  You are obliged to me for the advice I now give you to take care to avoid it; I should be sorry if it befel you.

You may guess, gentlemen, how sorry I was for having fallen into the hands of such a prattling impertinent barber; what an unseasonable adventure it was for a lover preparing for an interview!  I was quite angry.  I do not trouble my head, said I, in anger, with your advice and predictions, nor did I call you to consult your astrology; you came here to shave me, so pray do it, or be gone, and I will call another barber.  Sir, said he, with a dulness that put me out of all patience, what reason have you to be angry with me?  You do not know that all barbers are not like me, and that you could scarcely find such another, if you made it your business to search.  You only sent for a barber:  but here, in my person, you have the best barber in Bagdad; an experienced physician, a very profound chemist, an infallible astrologer, a finished grammarian, a complete orator, a subtle logician, a mathematician perfectly conversant in geometry, arithmetic, astronomy, and all the divisions of algebra; an historian fully master of the histories of all the kingdoms of the universe; besides, I know all parts of philosophy, and have all the traditions upon my finger ends.  I am a poet, an architect, nay, what is it I am not? there is nothing in nature hidden from me.  Your deceased father, to whose memory I pay a tribute of tears every time I think of him, was fully convinced of my merit; he was fond of me, and spoke of me in all companies as the greatest man in the world.  Out of gratitude and friendship for him, I am willing to take you into my protection, and guard you from all the evils that your stars may threaten.