Zobeide told the caliph her resolution of marrying the favourite lady; and he, leaving to her the liberty of doing upon that head as she pleased, granted the favourite a considerable sum to help her fortune.  When the ten days were expired, Zobeide ordered the contract of marriage to be drawn up; and the necessary preparations being made for the solemnity, the dancers, (both men and women) were called in, and rejoicings continued in the palace nine days.  The tenth day being appointed for the last ceremony of the marriage, the favourite lady was conducted to a bath, and I to another.  At night I sat down at table, and had all manner of rarities served up to me, and, among other things ragoo with garlic, such as you have now forced me to eat of.  This ragoo I liked so well, that I scarcely touched any other of the dishes.  But such was my unhappiness, that when I rose from the table, I only wiped my hands instead of washing them well; a piece of negligence of which I had never before been guilty.  Though it was night, the whole apartment of the ladies was as light as day, by means of illuminations.  Nothing was to be heard in the palace but music and acclamations of joy.  My bride and I were introduced into a great hall, where we were placed upon two thrones.  The women who attended her made her shift herself several times, and painted her face with different sorts of colours, according to the usual custom on wedding- days; and every time she changed her habit, they exposed her to my view.

After these ceremonies, we were conducted to the wedding- room, and, as soon as the company retired, I approached to embrace my mistress, but, instead of answering me with transports, she shoved me off, and cried out most fearfully; upon which all the ladies of the apartment came running into the chamber to know what she cried for; and, for my own part, I was so thunderstruck, that I stood, without the power of so much as asking what she meant by it.  Dear sister, said they to her, what is the matter?  Let us know it, that we may try to relieve you.  Take, said she, out of my sight that vile fellow.  Why, madam, said I, wherein have I deserved your displeasure?  You are a villain, said she, furiously:  what, to eat garlic, and not wash your hands!  Do you think that I would suffer such a filthy fellow to touch me?  Down with him, down with him upon the ground, continued she, addressing herself to the ladies; and pray let me have a good bull’s pizzle.  In short, I was thrown down upon the ground, and while some held my hands, and others my feet, my wife, who was presently furnished with a weapon, laid on me most unmercifully, till I could scarcely breathe:  then she said to the ladies, Take him, send him to the justiciary judge, and let the hand be cut off with which he fed upon the garlic ragoo.  God bless my soul, cried I, must I be beat, bruised, unmercifully mauled, and, to complete my affliction, have my hand cut off, for eating of a ragoo with garlic, and forgetting to wash my hands?  What proportion is there between the punishment and the crime?  Plague on the ragoo, plague on the cook that dressed it, and may he be equally unhappy that served it up!