Getting Married eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 213 pages of information about Getting Married.

Getting Married eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 213 pages of information about Getting Married.

Hotchkiss [deliberately] I shall pay my first visit to your husband this afternoon.

Mrs George.  Youll see what he’ll say to you when I tell him what youve just done.

Hotchkiss.  What can he say?  What dare he say?

Mrs George.  Suppose he kicks you out of the house?

Hotchkiss.  How can he?  Ive fought seven duels with sabres.  Ive muscles of iron.  Nothing hurts me:  not even broken bones.  Fighting is absolutely uninteresting to me because it doesnt frighten me or amuse me; and I always win.  Your husband is in all these respects an average man, probably.  He will be horribly afraid of me; and if under the stimulus of your presence, and for your sake, and because it is the right thing to do among vulgar people, he were to attack me, I should simply defeat him and humiliate him [he gradually gets his hands on the chair and takes it from her, as his words go home phrase by phrase].  Sooner than expose him to that, you would suffer a thousand stolen kisses, wouldnt you?

Mrs George [in utter consternation] You young viper!

Hotchkiss.  Ha ha!  You are in my power.  That is one of the oversights of your code of honor for husbands:  the man who can bully them can insult their wives with impunity.  Tell him if you dare.  If I choose to take ten kisses, how will you prevent me?

Mrs George.  You come within reach of me and I’ll not leave a hair on your head.

Hotchkiss [catching her wrists dexterously] Ive got your hands.

Mrs George.  Youve not got my teeth.  Let go; or I’ll bite.  I will, I tell you.  Let go.

Hotchkiss.  Bite away:  I shall taste quite as nice as George.

Mrs George.  You beast.  Let me go.  Do you call yourself a gentleman, to use your brute strength against a woman?

Hotchkiss.  You are stronger than me in every way but this.  Do you think I will give up my one advantage?  Promise youll receive me when I call this afternoon.

Mrs George.  After what youve just done?  Not if it was to save my life.

Hotchkiss.  I’ll amuse George.

Mrs George.  He wont be in.

Hotchkiss [taken aback] Do you mean that we should be alone?

Mrs George [snatching away her hands triumphantly as his grasp relaxes] Aha!  Thats cooled you, has it?

Hotchkiss [anxiously] When will George be at home?

Mrs George.  It wont matter to you whether he’s at home or not. 
The door will be slammed in your face whenever you call.

Hotchkiss.  No servant in London is strong enough to close a door that I mean to keep open.  You cant escape me.  If you persist, I’ll go into the coal trade; make George’s acquaintance on the coal exchange; and coax him to take me home with him to make your acquaintance.

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Project Gutenberg
Getting Married from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.