Here Philostratus paused, and gazed inquiringly at her; but she only shook her head gently, and answered: 

“My brain is so confused that I can scarcely hear even, but I feel that your words are well meant and wise.  What you put before me would certainly be worth considering if there were anything left for me to consider about.  I have promised myself to another, who is more to me than all the world—­more than the gratitude and blessings of endangered lives of which I know nothing.  I am but a poor girl who only asks to be happy.  Neither gods nor men expect more of me than that I should do my duty toward those whom I love.  And, then, who can say for certain that I should succeed in persuading Caesar to carry out my desires, whatever they might be?”

“We were witnesses of the power you exercised over him,” replied the philosopher; but Melissa shook her head, and continued eagerly:  “No, no! he only values in me the hand that eases his pain and want of sleep.  The love which he may feel for me makes him neither gentler nor better.  Only an hour or two before he declared that his heart was inclined to me, he had Titianus murdered!”

“One word from you,” the philosopher assured her, “and it would never have happened.  As empress, they will obey you as much as him.  Truly, child, it is no small thing to sit, like the gods, far above the rest of mankind.”

“No, no!” cried Melissa, shuddering.  “Those heights!  Only to think of them makes everything spin round me.  Only one who is free from such giddiness dare to occupy such a place.  Every one must desire to do what he can do best.  I could be a good housewife to Diodoros, but I should be a bad empress.  I was not born to greatness.  And, besides—­what is happiness?  I only felt happy when I did what was my duty, in peace and quiet.  Were I empress, fear would never leave me for a moment.  Oh.  I know enough of the hideous terror which this awful being creates around him; and before I would consent to let it torture me to death by day and by night-morning, noon, and evening—­far rather would I die this very day.  Therefore, I have no choice.  I must flee from Caesar’s sight—­away hence—­far, far, away!”

Tears nearly choked her voice, but she struggled bravely against them.  Philostratus, however, did not fail to observe it, and gazed, first mournfully into her face and then thoughtfully on the ground.  At length he spoke with a slight sigh: 

“We gather experience in life, and yet, however old we may be, we act contrary to it.  Now I have to pay for it.  And yet it still lies in your hands to make me bless the day on which I spoke on your behalf.  Could you but succeed in rising to real greatness of soul, girl—­through you, I swear it, the subjects of this mighty kingdom would be saved from great tribulations!”

“But, my lord,” Melissa broke in, “who would ask such lofty things of a lowly maiden?  My mother taught me to be kind and helpful to others in the house, to my friends, and fellow-citizens; my own heart tells me to be faithful to my betrothed.  But I care not greatly for the Romans, and what to me are Gauls, Dacians, or whatever else these barbarians may be called?”