COMEDIAN: Does it say that in the book?
STRAIGHT: Sure.
COMEDIAN: Let me see it. (COMEDIAN tears out page.) Den vat do you do?
STRAIGHT: You put her vaist around your arms—
COMEDIAN: And den?
STRAIGHT: Den you squeeze it—
COMEDIAN: And den?
STRAIGHT: She’ll press her head upon your manly shoulder—
COMEDIAN: And den—
STRAIGHT: She looks up into your eyes—
COMEDIAN: And den?
STRAIGHT: You put the other arm around her—
COMEDIAN: And den?
STRAIGHT: You hold her tight—
COMEDIAN: And den?
STRAIGHT: You turn down the gas—
COMEDIAN: And den?
STRAIGHT: She sighs—
COMEDIAN: And den?
STRAIGHT: You sigh—
COMEDIAN: And den?
STRAIGHT: Dat’s the end of the book.
COMEDIAN: Is dat all?
STRAIGHT: Sure. What do you want for ten cents?
COMEDIAN: But vat do you do after you turn down the gas?
STRAIGHT: Do you expect the book to tell you everything?
AFTER THE SHOWER
A TWO-ACT FOR A
MAN AND WOMAN
By
Louis Weslyn
Author of “At the News Stand,” “The Girl and the Pearl,” “An Easy Mary,” “A Campus Flirtation,” Etc., Etc.
AFTER THE SHOWER
CHARACTERS
THE FELLOW THE GIRL
SCENE: A pretty country lane in One, (Special drop) supposed to be near Lake George. Rustic bench on R. of stage. When the orchestra begins the music for the act, the girl enters, dressed in a fashionable tailor-made gown, and carrying parasol. She comes on laughing, from L., and glancing back over her shoulder at THE FELLOW, who follows after her, a few paces behind. THE GIRL wears only one glove, and THE FELLOW is holding out the other one to her as he makes his entrance. He is dressed in a natty light summer suit and wears a neat straw hat.
THE GIRL: (As she comes on with a little run.) I don’t see why on earth you insist upon following me.
THE FELLOW: (Lifting his hat.) I never knew why I was on earth until I met you. (Waving glove at her.) Say, this is your glove—you know it’s your glove.
THE GIRL: (Laughingly.) It must belong to somebody else.
THE FELLOW: No, it doesn’t. I saw you drop it. Besides, you are wearing only one glove, and this one matches it.
THE GIRL: (Stopping on right of stage near rustic bench and turning to face him, holding out her hand.) You are right. It is my glove. I’ll take it, please.
THE FELLOW: (Stopping to gaze at her admiringly.) No, on second thought, I’ll keep it. (He folds it up tenderly, and places it in the upper left-hand pocket of his coat.) I’ll keep it right here, too,—near my heart.