“Do you say, Mrs.—­” the lawyer would inquire deferentially, “that you heard the sound of three blows?”

“Oh, thim blows!” the old lady would cry—­“thim turrible blows!  I could hear the villain as he laid thim on!  I could hear the poor, pitiful groans av her, and she so sufferin’!  ’Twas awful!  Howly Saints,’twould make yer blood run cowld!”

“Stop! stop!” exclaimed the lawyer.

“Ah, stop is it?  Ye can’t stop me till Oi’ve had me say to tell the whole truth.  I says to me daughter Ellen, says I:  ‘Th’ horrid baste is afther murtherin’ the poor thing,’ says I; `run out an’ git an officer!’”

“I object to all this!” shouts the lawyer.

“Ah, ye objec’, do ye?” retorts the old lady.  “Shure an’ ye’d have been after objectin’ if ye’d heard thim turrible blows that kilt her—­the poor, sufferin’, swate crayter!  I hope he gits all that’s comin’ to him—­bad cess to him for a blood-thirsty divil!”

The lawyer ignominiously abandoned the attack.

The writer recalls a somewhat similar instance, but one even better exhibiting the cleverness of an old woman, which occurred in the year 1901.  A man named Orlando J. Hackett, of prepossessing appearance and manners, was on trial, charged with converting to his own use money which had been intrusted to him for investment in realty.  The complainant was a shrewd old lady, who together with her daughter, had had a long series of transactions with Hackett which would have entirely confused the issue could the defence have brought them before the jury.  The whole contention of the prosecution was that Hackett had received the money for one purpose and used it for another.  During preparation for the trial the writer had had both ladies in his office and remembers making the remark: 

“Now, Mrs. ------, don’t forget that the charge here is that you
gave Mr. Hackett the money to put into real estate.   Nothing
else is comparatively of much importance.”

“Be sure and remember that, mother,” the daughter had admonished her.

In the course of a month the case came on for trial before Recorder Goff, in Part II of the General Sessions.  Mrs. ------ gave her testimony with great positiveness.  Mr. Lewis Stuyvesant Chanler, now Lieutenant-Governor of the State, arose to cross-examine her.

“Madam,” he began courteously, “you say you gave the defendant money?”

“I told him to put it into real estate, and he said he would!” replied Mrs. firmly.

“I did not ask you that, Mrs. ------,” politely interjected Mr.
Chanler.   “How much did you give him?”

“I told him to put it into real estate, and he said he would!” repeated the old lady wearily.

“But, madam, you do not answer my question!” exclaimed Chanler.  “How much did you give him?”

“I told him to put it into real—­” began the old lady again.

“Yes, yes!” cried the lawyer; “we know that!  Answer the question.”