Jonathan.  My dear, I wish you would lie a little longer in bed this morning.

Laetitia.  Indeed I cannot; I am engaged to breakfast with Jack Strongbow.

Jonathan.  I don’t know what Jack Strongbow doth so often at my house.  I assure you I am uneasy at it; for, though I have no suspicion of your virtue, yet it may injure your reputation in the opinion of my neighbours.

Laetitia.  I don’t trouble my head about my neighbours; and they shall no more tell me what company I am to keep than my husband shall.

Jonathan.  A good wife would keep no company which made her husband uneasy.

Laetitia.  You might have found one of those good wives, sir, if you had pleased; I had no objection to it.

Jonathan.  I thought I had found one in you.

Laetitia.  You did!  I am very much obliged to you for thinking me so poor-spirited a creature; but I hope to convince you to the contrary.  What, I suppose you took me for a raw senseless girl, who knew nothing what other married women do!

Jonathan.  No matter what I took you for:  I have taken you for better and worse.

Laetitia.  And at your own desire too; for I am sure you never had mine.  I should not have broken my heart if Mr. Wild had thought proper to bestow himself on any other more happy woman.  Ha, ha!

Jonathan.  I hope, madam, you don’t imagine that was not in my power, or that I married you out of any kind of necessity.

Laetitia.  O no, sir; I am convinced there are silly women enough.  And far be it from me to accuse you of any necessity for a wife.  I believe you could have been very well contented with the state of a bachelor; I have no reason to complain of your necessities; but that, you know, a woman cannot tell beforehand.

Jonathan.  I can’t guess what you would insinuate, for I believe no woman had ever less reason to complain of her husband’s want of fondness.

Laetitia.  Then some, I am certain, have great reason to complain of the price they give for them.  But I know better things. (These words were spoken with a very great air, and toss of the head.)

Jonathan.  Well, my sweeting, I will make it impossible for you to wish me more fond.

Laetitia.  Pray, Mr. Wild, none of this nauseous behaviour, nor those odious words.  I wish you were fond!  I assure you, I don’t know what you would pretend to insinuate of me.  I have no wishes which misbecome a virtuous woman.  No, nor should not, if I had married for love.  And especially now, when nobody, I am sure, can suspect me of any such thing.

Jonathan.  If you did not marry for love why did you marry?

Laetitia.  Because it was convenient, and my parents forced me.

Jonathan.  I hope, madam, at least, you will not tell me to my face you have made your convenience of me.

Laetitia.  I have made nothing of you; nor do I desire the honour of making anything of you.