When our two friends met the next morning the count (who, though he did not agree with the whole of his friend’s doctrine, was, however, highly pleased with his argument) began to bewail the misfortune of his captivity, and the backwardness of friends to assist each other in their necessities; but what vexed him, he said, most, was the cruelty of the fair: for he intrusted Wild with the secret of his having had an intrigue with Miss Theodosia, the elder of the Miss Snaps, ever since his confinement, though he could not prevail with her to set him at liberty. Wild answered, with a smile, “It was no wonder a woman should wish to confine her lover where she might be sure of having him entirely to herself;” but added, he believed he could tell him a method of certainly procuring his escape. The count eagerly besought him to acquaint him with it. Wild told him bribery was the surest means, and advised him to apply to the maid. The count thanked him, but returned, “That he had not a farthing left besides one guinea, which he had then given her to change.” To which Wild said, “He must make it up with promises, which he supposed he was courtier enough to know how to put off.” The count greatly applauded the advice, and said he hoped he should be able in time to persuade him to condescend to be a great man, for which he was so perfectly well qualified.
This method being concluded on, the two friends sat down to cards, a circumstance which I should not have mentioned but for the sake of observing the prodigious force of habit; for though the count knew if he won ever so much of Mr. Wild he should not receive a shilling, yet could he not refrain from packing the cards; nor could Wild keep his hands out of his friend’s pockets, though he knew there was nothing in them.
When the maid came home the count began to put it to her; offered her all he had, and promised mountains in futuro; but all in vain— the maid’s honesty was impregnable. She said, “She would not break her trust for the whole world; no, not if she could gain a hundred pound by it.” Upon which Wild stepping up and telling her “She need not fear losing her place, for it would never be found out; that they could throw a pair of sheets into the street, by which it might appear he got out at a window; that he himself would swear he saw him descending; that the money would be so much gains in her pocket; that, besides his promises, which she might depend on being performed, she would receive from him twenty shillings and ninepence in ready money (for she had only laid out threepence in plain Spanish); and lastly, that, besides his honour, the count should leave a pair of gold buttons (which afterwards turned out to be brass) of great value, in her hands, as a further pawn.”
The maid still remained inflexible, till Wild offered to lend his friend a guinea more, and to deposit it immediately in her hands. This reinforcement bore down the poor girl’s resolution, and she faithfully promised to open the door to the count that evening.