things show we are civilized, and that God approves
of us more than any other type of creature ever created.
We take possession of nations, not by thunder of war,
but by clatter of dinner-plates. We do not raise
armies, we build hotels; and we settle ourselves in
Egypt as we do at Homburg, to dress and dine and sleep
and sniff contempt on all things but ourselves, to
such an extent that we have actually got into the habit
of calling the natives of the places we usurp “foreigners.”
We are the foreigners; but somehow we never can
see it. Wherever we condescend to build hotels,
that spot we consider ours. We are surprised
at the impertinence of Frankfort people who presume
to visit Homburg while we are having our “season”
there; we wonder how they dare do it! And, of
a truth, they seem amazed at their own boldness, and
creep shyly through the Kur-Garten as though fearing
to be turned out by the custodians. The same thing
occurs in Egypt; we are frequently astounded at what
we call “the impertinence of these foreigners,”
i.e. the natives. They ought to be proud
to have us and our elephant-legs; glad to see such
noble and beautiful types of civilization as the stout
parvenu with his pendant paunch, and his family of
gawky youths and maidens of the large-toothed, long-limbed
genus; glad to see the English “mamma,”
who never grows old, but wears young hair in innocent
curls, and has her wrinkles annually “massaged”
out by a Paris artiste in complexion. The Desert-Born,
we say, should be happy and grateful to see such sights,
and not demand so much “backsheesh.”
In fact, the Desert-Born should not get so much in
our way as he does; he is a very good servant, of
course, but as a man and a brother— pooh!
Egypt may be his country, and he may love it as much
as we love England; but our feelings are more to be
considered than his, and there is no connecting link
of human sympathy between Elephant-Legs and sun-browned
Nudity!
So at least thought Sir Chetwynd Lyle, a stout gentleman
of coarse build and coarser physiognomy, as he sat
in a deep arm-chair in the great hall or lounge of
the Gezireh Palace Hotel, smoking after dinner in
the company of two or three acquaintances with whom
he had fraternized during his stay in Cairo. Sir
Chetwynd was fond of airing his opinions for the benefit
of as many people who cared to listen to him, and
Sir Chetwynd had some right to his opinions, inasmuch
as he was the editor and proprietor of a large London
newspaper. His knighthood was quite a recent distinction,
and nobody knew exactly how he had managed to get it.
He had originally been known in Fleet Street by the
irreverent sobriquet of “greasy Chetwynd,”
owing to his largeness, oiliness and general air of
blandly-meaningless benevolence. He had a wife
and two daughters, and one of his objects in wintering
at Cairo was to get his cherished children married.
It was time, for the bloom was slightly off the fair
girl-roses,—the dainty petals of the delicate