Potter’s visit to Washington was connected with as many as forty different things, they came to the very convenient conclusion that he was really come to ask of Congress compensation for extraordinary services rendered the government by his dead ancestor, (living ones he had none,) during the war of 1812, such being very common at this day.  And as nothing could be more fatal to a claim before Congress than the fact that it was founded in honesty, the lobby screw would swear by his ability to get all fictitious ones through.  This was the result of that indifference among Congressmen which makes the distinction between justice and fraud something too insignificant to waste time over.

The general declared with all his power of persuasion that he had no claim before Congress; and Tickler was ready to swear to the truth of what he said.  But divers lobby men and correspondents refused to be convinced; and after putting an infinite number of questions to him, swore they would take it up, regardless of its character, and “rush it through” Congress for twenty five per cent.

It ought to be mentioned here that the “correspondent” esteems himself a much more respectable gentleman than the “lobby agent,” whom he affects to hold in virtuous contempt.  More than once was the general warned by these facile gentlemen of the press, not to have anything to do with the vagabonds of the lobby, who, though they gave it out that they had Congress between their thumbs, and could double it up, and mould it exactly to their liking, were regarded by every member honest enough not to crook his palm more than once during the session, as so many buzzards resolved on having carrion.

The general had, however, been advised by Glanmoregain to slip a trifle into the palms of certain correspondents, to the end that their praise could do no harm, and might do much good.

Now there was living in Washington about this time, one Ben Stretcher, a man of wonderful genius, and a correspondent of no less than five very enterprising newspapers, for all of which he manufactured wars and diplomatic irruptions with a facility that would have put Lord Stratford de Radcliffe to the blush.  Stretcher knew everbody in Washington, and everybody in Washington knew Stretcher.  If an enterprising gentleman came to Washington with the very harmless and common inclination of plucking the government, Stretcher was sure to make his acquaintance, and equally sure to find out what feathers he had, and how best they could be plucked.  Wearing his beard after the manner of an apostle, and having a countenance into which he could infuse an air of great wisdom, Ben was sure to insinuate himself into the good graces of every new comer, to whom he would confide all the secrets of the government, which he carried about on his head, as a negro does a basket of apples.  His skill at manufacturing state secrets was, however, equaled only by his skill for finding out state secrets.