So cut, so colour’d, and so curl’d,
As those are in th’ Inferior World. 
H’ had read DEE’s Prefaces before, 235
The Dev’l, and Euclid, o’er and o’er;
And all the intrigues ’twixt him and Kelly,
LESCUS and th’ emperor, wou’d tell ye;
But with the Moon was more familiar
Than e’er was almanack well-willer; 240
Her secrets understood so clear,
That some believ’d he had been there;
Knew when she was in the fittest mood
For cutting corns, or letting blood;
When for anointing scabs or itches, 245
Or to the bum applying leeches;
When sows and bitches may be spay’d,
And in what sign best cyder’s made: 
Whether the wane be, or increase,
Best to set garlick, or sow pease:  250
Who first found out the Man i’ th’ Moon,
That to the ancients was unknown;
How many dukes, and earls, and peers,
Are in the planetary spheres;
Their airy empire and command, 255
Their sev’ral strengths by sea and land;
What factions th’ have, and what they drive at
In public vogue, or what in private;
With what designs and interests
Each party manages contests. 260
He made an instrument to know
If the Moon shine at full or no;
That wou’d as soon as e’er she shone, straight
Whether ’twere day or night demonstrate;
Tell what her d’meter t’ an inch is, 265
And prove that she’s not made of green cheese. 
It wou’d demonstrate, that the Man in
The Moon’s a Sea Mediterranean;
And that it is no dog nor bitch,
That stands behind him at his breech, 270
But a huge Caspian Sea, or lake,
With arms, which men for legs mistake;
How large a gulph his tail composes,
And what a goodly bay his nose is;
How many German leagues by th’ scale 275
Cape Snout’s from Promontory Tail. 
He made a planetary gin,
Which rats would run their own heads in,
And cause on purpose to be taken,
Without th’ expence of cheese or bacon. 280
With lute-strings he would counterfeit
Maggots that crawl on dish of meat: 
Quote moles and spots on any place
O’ th’ body, by the index face: 
Detect lost maiden-heads by sneezing, 285
Or breaking wind of dames, or pissing;
Cure warts and corns with application
Of med’cines to th’ imagination;
Fright agues into dogs, and scare
With rhimes the tooth-ach and catarrh; 290
Chace evil spirits away by dint
Of cickle, horse-shoe, hollow-flint;
Spit fire out of a walnut-shell,
Which made the Roman slaves rebel;
And fire a mine in China here 295
With sympathetic gunpowder. 
He knew whats’ever’s to be known,