When I was in Parliament, I had the additional reason of choosing to be entirely free; and my strongest reason of all is, that I will be at liberty to speak truth both living and dead.  This outweighs all considerations of interest, and will convince you, though I believe you do not want that conviction, that my yesterday’s letter was as sincere in its resolution as in its professions to you.  Let the matter drop entirely, as it is now Of no consequence.  Adieu!  Yours ever.

(15) Amelia, daughter of William Watts, Esq. formerly governor of Fort William, in Bengal.-E.

Letter 13 To George Montagu, Esq.  Strawberry Hill, Oct. 3, 1770. (page 38)

I am going on in the sixth week of my fit, and having had a return this morning in my knee, I cannot flatter myself with any approaching prospect of recovery.  The gate of painful age seems open to me, and I must travel through it as I may!  If you have not written one word for another, I am at a loss to understand you.  You say you have taken a house in London for a year, that you are gone to Waldeshare for six months, and then shall come for the winter.  Either you mean six weeks, or differ with most people in reckoning April the beginning of winter.  I hope your pen was in a hurry, rather than your calculation so uncommon; I certainly shall be glad of your residing in London.  I have long wished to live nearer to you, but it was in happier days.  I am now so dismayed by these returns of gout, that I can promise myself few comforts in any future scenes of my life.

I am much obliged to Lord Guildford and Lord North, and was very sorry that the latter came to see Strawberry in so bad a day, and when I was so extremely ill, and full of pain, that I scarce knew he was here; and as my coachman was gone to London, to fetch me bootikins, there was no carriage to offer him; but, indeed, in the condition I then was, I was not capable of doing any of the honours of my house, suffering at once in my hand, knee, and both feet.  I am still lifted out of bed by two servants; and by their help travel from my bedchamber down to the couch in my blue room; but I shall conclude, rather than tire you with so unpleasant a history.  Adieu!  Yours ever.

Letter 14 To George Montagu, Esq.  Arlington Street, Oct. 16, 1770. (page 39)

At last I have been able to remove to London; but though long weeks are gone and over since I was seized, I am only able to creep about upon a flat floor, but cannot go up and down stairs.  However, I have patience, as I can at least fetch a book for myself’, instead of having a servant bring me a wrong one.  I am much obliged to Lord Guildford for his goodness to me, and beg my thanks to him.  When you go to Canterbury, pray don’t wake the Black Prince.  I am very unwarlike, and desire to live the rest of my time upon the stock of glory I saved to my share Out Of the last war.  I know not more news than I did at Strawberry; there are not more people in town than I saw there, and I intend to return thither on Friday or Saturday.  Adieu!  Yours ever.