“The porter gave me every assistance that I could have expected at the hands of my oldest friend:  I accepted his services with the liveliest gratitude. `Alas!’ said I to him, `you then are affected by my sufferings!  The whole world abandons me; my own father proves one of the very cruellest of my persecutors; no person feels pity for me!  You alone, in this abode of suffering and shame—­you alone exhibit compassion for the most wretched of mankind!’ He advised me not to appear in the street until I had recovered a little from my affliction. `Do not stop me,’ said I, as I went out; `we shall meet again sooner than you imagine:  get ready your darkest dungeon, for I shall shortly become its tenant.’

“In fact, my first idea was nothing less than to make away with the two G——­ M——­s, and the lieutenant-general of police; and then to attack the Hospital, sword in hand, assisted by all whom I could enlist in my cause.  Even my father’s life was hardly respected, so just appeared my feelings of vengeance; for the porter had informed me that he and G——­ M——­ were jointly the authors of my ruin.

“But when I had advanced some paces into the street, and the fresh air had cooled my excitement, I gradually viewed matters in a more rational mood.  The death of our enemies could be of little use to Manon; and the obvious effect of such violence would be to deprive me of all other chance of serving her.  Besides, could I ever bring myself to be a cowardly assassin?  By what other means could I accomplish my revenge?  I set all my ingenuity and all my efforts at work to procure the deliverance of Manon, leaving everything else to be considered hereafter when I had succeeded in this first and paramount object.

“I had very little money left; money, however, was an indispensable basis for all my operations.  I only knew three persons from whom I had any right to ask pecuniary assistance—­M. de T——­, Tiberge, and my father.  There appeared little chance of obtaining any from the two latter, and I was really ashamed again to importune M. de T——.  But it is not in desperate emergencies that one stands upon points of ceremony.  I went first to the seminary of St. Sulpice, without considering whether I should be recognised.  I asked for Tiberge.  His first words showed me that he knew nothing of my latest adventure:  this made me change the design I had originally formed of appealing at once to his compassion.  I spoke generally of the pleasure it had given me to see my father again; and I then begged of him to lend me some money, under the pretext of being anxious before I left Paris to pay a few little debts, which I wished to keep secret.  He handed me his purse, without a single remark.  I took twenty or twenty-five pounds, which it contained.  I offered him my note of hand, but he was too generous to accept it.