he finds himself surrounded by a convulsed and a half
dissolved one? He cannot live in solitude, he
must belong to some community bound by some ties, however
imperfect. Men mutually support and add to the
boldness and confidence of each other; the weakness
of each is strengthened by the force of the whole.
I had never before these calamitous times formed any
such ideas; I lived on, laboured and prospered, without
having ever studied on what the security of my life
and the foundation of my prosperity were established:
I perceived them just as they left me. Never
was a situation so singularly terrible as mine, in
every possible respect, as a member of an extensive
society, as a citizen of an inferior division of the
same society, as a husband, as a father, as a man
who exquisitely feels for the miseries of others as
well as for his own! But alas! so much is everything
now subverted among us, that the very word misery,
with which we were hardly acquainted before, no longer
conveys the same ideas; or rather tired with feeling
for the miseries of others, every one feels now for
himself alone. When I consider myself as connected
in all these characters, as bound by so many cords,
all uniting in my heart, I am seized with a fever
of the mind, I am transported beyond that degree of
calmness which is necessary to delineate our thoughts.
I feel as if my reason wanted to leave me, as if it
would burst its poor weak tenement: again I try
to compose myself, I grow cool, and preconceiving
the dreadful loss, I endeavour to retain the useful
guest.
You know the position of our settlement; I need not
therefore describe it. To the west it is inclosed
by a chain of mountains, reaching to——;
to the east, the country is as yet but thinly inhabited;
we are almost insulated, and the houses are at a considerable
distance from each other. From the mountains we
have but too much reason to expect our dreadful enemy;
the wilderness is a harbour where it is impossible
to find them. It is a door through which they
can enter our country whenever they please; and, as
they seem determined to destroy the whole chain of
frontiers, our fate cannot be far distant: from
Lake Champlain, almost all has been conflagrated one
after another. What renders these incursions still
more terrible is, that they most commonly take place
in the dead of the night; we never go to our fields
but we are seized with an involuntary fear, which
lessens our strength and weakens our labour.
No other subject of conversation intervenes between
the different accounts, which spread through the country,
of successive acts of devastation; and these told
in chimney-corners, swell themselves in our affrighted
imaginations into the most terrific ideas! We
never sit down either to dinner or supper, but the
least noise immediately spreads a general alarm and
prevents us from enjoying the comfort of our meals.
The very appetite proceeding from labour and peace
of mind is gone; we eat just enough to keep us alive: