go through me like all needles my eyes were dancing
I remember after when I looked at myself in the glass
hardly recognised myself the change he was attractive
to a girl in spite of his being a little bald intelligent
looking disappointed and gay at the same time he was
like Thomas in the shadow of Ashlydyat I had a splendid
skin from the sun and the excitement like a rose I
didnt get a wink of sleep it wouldnt have been nice
on account of her but I could have stopped it in time
she gave me the Moonstone to read that was the first
I read of Wilkie Collins East Lynne I read and the
shadow of Ashlydyat Mrs Henry Wood Henry Dunbar by
that other woman I lent him afterwards with Mulveys
photo in it so as he see I wasnt without and Lord
Lytton Eugene Aram Molly bawn she gave me by Mrs Hungerford
on account of the name I dont like books with a Molly
in them like that one he brought me about the one
from Flanders a whore always shoplifting anything
she could cloth and stuff and yards of it O this blanket
is too heavy on me thats better I havent even one decent
nightdress this thing gets all rolled under me besides
him and his fooling thats better I used to be weltering
then in the heat my shift drenched with the sweat
stuck in the cheeks of my bottom on the chair when
I stood up they were so fattish and firm when I got
up on the sofa cushions to see with my clothes up
and the bugs tons of them at night and the mosquito
nets I couldnt read a line Lord how long ago it seems
centuries of course they never came back and she didnt
put her address right on it either she may have noticed
her wogger people were always going away and we never
I remember that day with the waves and the boats with
their high heads rocking and the smell of ship those
Officers uniforms on shore leave made me seasick he
didnt say anything he was very serious I had the high
buttoned boots on and my skirt was blowing she kissed
me six or seven times didnt I cry yes I believe I did
or near it my lips were taittering when I said goodbye
she had a Gorgeous wrap of some special kind of blue
colour on her for the voyage made very peculiarly
to one side like and it was extremely pretty it got
as dull as the devil after they went I was almost
planning to run away mad out of it somewhere were
never easy where we are father or aunt or marriage
waiting always waiting to guiiiide him toooo me waiting
nor speeeed his flying feet their damn guns bursting
and booming all over the shop especially the Queens
birthday and throwing everything down in all directions
if you didnt open the windows when general Ulysses
Grant whoever he was or did supposed to be some great
fellow landed off the ship and old Sprague the consul
that was there from before the flood dressed up poor
man and he in mourning for the son then the same old
bugles for reveille in the morning and drums rolling
and the unfortunate poor devils of soldiers walking
about with messtins smelling the place more than the
old longbearded jews in their jellibees and levites