Little man. [Wistfully] Don’t you believe in human nature?

American.  Very stimulating question.

     [He looks round for opinions.  The Dutch youth laughs.]

Englishman. [Holding out his half of the paper to his wife] Swap!

     [His wife swaps.]

German.  In human nature I believe so far as I can see him—­no more.

American.  Now that ‘pears to me kind o’ blasphemy.  I believe in heroism.  I opine there’s not one of us settin’ around here that’s not a hero—­give him the occasion.

Little man.  Oh!  Do you believe that?

American.  Well!  I judge a hero is just a person that’ll help another at the expense of himself.  Take that poor woman there.  Well, now, she’s a heroine, I guess.  She would die for her baby any old time.

German.  Animals will die for their babies.  That is nothing.

American.  I carry it further.  I postulate we would all die for that baby if a locomotive was to trundle up right here and try to handle it. [To the German] I guess you don’t know how good you are. [As the German is twisting up the ends of his moustache—­to the ENGLISHWOMAN] I should like to have you express an opinion, ma’am.

ENGLISHWOMAN.  I beg your pardon.

American.  The English are very humanitarian; they have a very high sense of duty.  So have the Germans, so have the Americans. [To the Dutch youth] I judge even in your little country they have that.  This is an epoch of equality and high-toned ideals. [To the little man] What is your nationality, sir?

Little man.  I’m afraid I’m nothing particular.  My father was half-English and half-American, and my mother half-German and half-Dutch.

American.  My!  That’s a bit streaky, any old way. [The policeman passes again] Now, I don’t believe we’ve much use any more for those gentlemen in buttons.  We’ve grown kind of mild—­we don’t think of self as we used to do.

     [The waiter has appeared in the doorway.]

German. [In a voice of thunder] ‘Cigarren!  Donnerwetter’!

American. [Shaking his fist at the vanishing waiter] That flash of beer!

Waiter.  ‘Komm’ gleich’!

American.  A little more, and he will join George Washington!  I was about to remark when he intruded:  In this year of grace 1913 the kingdom of Christ is quite a going concern.  We are mighty near universal brotherhood.  The colonel here [He indicates the German] is a man of blood and iron, but give him an opportunity to be magnanimous, and he’ll be right there.  Oh, sir! yep!

     [The German, with a profound mixture of pleasure and cynicism,
     brushes up the ends of his moustache.]