[He takes of his ulster
and hangs it over the back of an
arm-chair.]
Ann. They see you coming. Anybody can see you coming, Daddy. That’s why you ought to be so careful. I shall make you wear a hard hat. Those squashy hats of yours are hopelessly inefficient.
Wellwyn. [Gazing at his hat.] Calway wears one.
Ann. As if anyone would beg of Professor Calway.
Wellwyn. Well-perhaps not. You know, Ann, I admire that fellow. Wonderful power of-of-theory! How a man can be so absolutely tidy in his mind! It’s most exciting.
Ann. Has any one begged of you to-day?
Wellwyn. [Doubtfully.] No—no.
Ann. [After a long, severe look.] Will you have rum in your tea?
Wellwyn. [Crestfallen.] Yes, my dear—a good deal.
Ann. [Pouring out the rum, and handing him the glass.] Well, who was it?
Wellwyn. He didn’t beg of me. [Losing
himself in recollection.]
Interesting old creature, Ann—real type.
Old cabman.
Ann. Where?
Wellwyn. Just on the Embankment.
Ann. Of course! Daddy, you know the Embankment ones are always rotters.
Wellwyn. Yes, my dear; but this wasn’t.
Ann. Did you give him your card?
Wellwyn. I—I—don’t
Ann. Did you, Daddy?
Wellwyn. I’m rather afraid I may have!
Ann. May have! It’s simply immoral.
Wellwyn. Well, the old fellow was so awfully human, Ann. Besides, I didn’t give him any money—hadn’t got any.
Ann. Look here, Daddy! Did you ever ask anybody for anything? You know you never did, you’d starve first. So would anybody decent. Then, why won’t you see that people who beg are rotters?
Wellwyn. But, my dear, we’re not all the same. They wouldn’t do it if it wasn’t natural to them. One likes to be friendly. What’s the use of being alive if one isn’t?
Ann. Daddy, you’re hopeless.
Wellwyn. But, look here, Ann, the whole thing’s so jolly complicated. According to Calway, we’re to give the State all we can spare, to make the undeserving deserving. He’s a Professor; he ought to know. But old Hoxton’s always dinning it into me that we ought to support private organisations for helping the deserving, and damn the undeserving. Well, that’s just the opposite. And he’s a J.P. Tremendous experience. And the Vicar seems to be for a little bit of both. Well, what the devil——? My trouble is, whichever I’m with, he always converts me. [Ruefully.] And there’s no fun in any of them.
Ann. [Rising.] Oh! Daddy, you are so—don’t you know that you’re the despair of all social reformers? [She envelops him.] There’s a tear in the left knee of your trousers. You’re not to wear them again.