that I should win over poverty and want. I was
so poor in worldly goods, but oh!—Croesus
could not have bought my proud hopes! So rich,
so overflowing with high hope! As I think of
my feelings that day, among the primroses and pine
cones, it seems a hundred years ago, and I recall the
image of a girl long dead; such a proud girl; so happy
in the beautiful world of the art she loved!
Then some strange awful curse that had lain in wait,
ambushed among the flowers I gathered that last day
of my dead existence, fell upon me—I saw
you! No wonder I shivered, when you met me.
I saw you. Then my sun sickened and went out,
and my hopes crumbled, and my youth shrivelled and
perished forever; and the wide world is a rayless
dungeon, and the girl Beryl is buried so deep, that
the Angels of the Resurrection will never find her!—and
I?—I am only a withered, disgraced woman,
hurled into a den; trampled, branded; with a soul
devoured by despairing bitterness, with a broken heart,
a brain on fire! If you had drawn a knife across
my throat, or sent a bullet through my temples, my
spirit might have rested in the Beyond, and I could
have forgiven that which hastened me to heaven; but
you strangled my hopes, and mutilated my youth, and
dishonored my father’s name!—You robbed
me of my stainless character, and cast me among outlaws
and fiends!— Worse yet, oh! blackest of
all your crimes!—you have almost throttled
my faith in Christ. You have torn away my hold
upon the eternal God! You are the curse of my
life. You wish you had never set your eyes on
me? Take courage, finish your work; the best of
me is utterly dead already, and when you have taken
my blood, and laid my polluted body in a convict’s
shallow grave, your enmity will be satiated.
Then I, at least, I shall be free from my hideous curse.
If there be any comfort left me, it lurks in the knowledge
that when you succeed in convicting me, the same world
will no longer hold us both.”
Was it the fever of disease, or incipient madness
that blazed in her eyes, flamed on her cheeks, and
lent such thrilling cadence to her pure clear voice?
Was she a consummate actress, or had he made a frightful
mistake, and goaded an innocent girl to the verge of
frenzy? Some occult influence seemed clouding
his hitherto infallible perceptions, melting his heart,
paralyzing his will. He walked up and down the
floor, with his hands clasped behind him, then came
close to the prisoner.
“If I have unjustly suspected and persecuted
you, may God forgive me! If I have wronged you
by suspicion and accusation of a crime which you did
not commit, then my atonement shall be your triumphant
vindication. I would give a good deal to know
that your hands are as pure as they look, and innocent
of theft and murder. Tell me—tell
me the truth. I will save you, I will give you
back all that you have lost, and tenfold more.
For God’s sake, for your own sake, and for mine,
I entreat you to tell me the truth. Did you go
back to ‘Elm Bluff’ that night, after
I met you in the pine woods?”