I am much deceived if we do not resemble that man.  Oh! people of the future! when on a warm summer day you bend over your plows in the green fields of your native land; when you see in the pure sunlight, under a spotless sky, the earth, your fruitful mother, smiling in her matutinal robe on the workman, her well-beloved child; when drying on your brow the holy baptism of sweat, you cast your eye over the vast horizon, where there will not be one blade higher than another in the human harvest, but only violets and marguerites in the midst of ripening ears; oh! free men! when you thank God that you were born for that harvest, think of those who are no more, tell yourself that we have dearly purchased the repose which you enjoy; pity us more than all your fathers, for we have suffered the evil which entitled them to pity and we have lost that which consoled them.

CHAPTER III

THE BEGINNING OF THE CONFESSIONS

I have to explain how I was first taken with the malady of the age.

I was at table, at a great supper, after a masquerade.  About me were my friends, richly costumed, on all sides young men and women, all sparkling with beauty and joy; on the right and on the left exquisite dishes, flagons, splendor, flowers; above my head was an obstreperous orchestra, and before me my loved one, whom I idolized.

I was then nineteen; I had passed through no great misfortune, I had suffered from no disease; my character was at once haughty and frank, my heart full of the hopes of youth.  The fumes of wine fermented in my head; it was one of those moments of intoxication when all that one sees and hears speaks to one of the well-beloved.  All nature appeared a beautiful stone with a thousand facets, on which was engraven the mysterious name.  One would willingly embrace all who smile, and feel that he is brother of all who live.  My mistress had granted me a rendezvous, and I was gently raising my glass to my lips while my eyes were fixed on her.

As I turned to take a napkin, my fork fell.  I stooped to pick it up, and not finding it at first I raised the table cloth to see where it had rolled.  I then saw under the table my mistress’s foot; it touched that of a young man seated beside her; from time to time they exchanged a gentle pressure.

Perfectly calm, I asked for another fork and continued my supper.  My mistress and her neighbor, on their side, were very quiet, talking but little and never looking at each other.  The young man had his elbows on the table and was chatting with another woman, who was showing him her necklace and bracelets.  My mistress sat motionless, her eyes fixed and swimming with languor.  I watched both of them during the entire supper, and I saw nothing either in their gestures or in their faces that could betray them.  Finally, at dessert, I dropped my napkin, and stooping down saw that they were still in the same position.