Conscience — Complete eBook

Hector Malot
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 318 pages of information about Conscience — Complete.

Conscience — Complete eBook

Hector Malot
This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 318 pages of information about Conscience — Complete.

And now was the greatest danger, that of meeting some one behind this door, or on the stairs.  He listened, and heard no noise.  He went out, and no one was to be seen.  Without running, but hastily, he descended the stairs.  Should he look in the lodge, or should he turn his head away?  He looked, but the concierge was not there.

A second later he was in the street mingling with the passersby, and he drew a long breath.

CHAPTER XIII

DISTRACTION

There was no longer any need to be cautious, to listen, to stretch his nerves, to restrain his heart; he could walk freely and reflect.

His first thought was to endeavor to explain to himself how he felt, and he found that it was an immense relief; something, doubtless, analogous to the returning to life after being in a state of asphyxiation.  Physically, he was calm; morally, he felt no remorse.  He was right, therefore, in his theory when he told Phillis that in the intelligent man remorse precedes the action, instead of following it.

But where he was mistaken was in imagining that during the act he should maintain his coolness and force, which, in reality, had failed him completely.

Going from one idea to another, tossed by irresolution, he was by no means the strong man that he had believed himself:  one to go to the end unmoved, ready to face every attack; master of his nerves as of his will, in full possession of all his powers.  On the contrary, he had been the plaything of agitation and weakness.  If a serious danger had risen. before him, he would not have known on which side to attack it; fear would have paralyzed him, and he would have been lost.

To tell the truth, his hand had been firm, but his head had been bewildered.

There was something humiliating in this, he was obliged to acknowledge; and, what was more serious, it was alarming.  Because, although everything had gone as he wished, up to the present time, all was not finished, nor even begun.

If the investigations of the law should reach him, how should he defend himself?

He felt sure that he had not been seen in Caffies house at the moment when the crime was committed; but does one ever know whether one has been seen or not?

And there was the production of money that he should use to pay his debts, which might become an accusation against which it would be difficult to defend himself.  In any case, he must be ready to explain his position.  And what might complicate the matter was, that Caffie, a careful man, had probably taken care to write the numbers of his bank-notes in a book, which would be found.

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Conscience — Complete from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.