We were soon remarked for being thus inseparable:  and what rendered us more conspicuous, my cousin was very tall, myself extremely short, so that we exhibited a very whimsical contrast.  This meagre figure, small, sallow countenance, heavy air, and supine gait, excited the ridicule of the children, who, in the gibberish of the country, nicknamed him ’Barna Bredanna’; and we no sooner got out of doors than our ears were assailed with a repetition of “Barna Bredanna.”  He bore this indignity with tolerable patience, but I was instantly for fighting.  This was what the young rogues aimed at.  I engaged accordingly, and was beat.  My poor cousin did all in his power to assist me, but he was weak, and a single stroke brought him to the ground.  I then became furious, and received several smart blows, some of which were aimed at ‘Barna Bredanna’.  This quarrel so far increased the evil, that, to avoid their insults, we could only show ourselves in the streets while they were employed at school.

I had already become a redresser of grievances; there only wanted a lady in the way to be a knight-errant in form.  This defect was soon supplied; I presently had two.  I frequently went to see my father at Nion, a small city in the Vaudois country, where he was now settled.  Being universally respected, the affection entertained for him extended to me:  and, during my visits, the question seemed to be, who should show me most kindness.  A Madame de Vulson, in particular, loaded me with caresses; and, to complete all, her daughter made me her gallant.  I need not explain what kind of gallant a boy of eleven must be to a girl of two and twenty; the artful hussies know how to set these puppets up in front, to conceal more serious engagements.  On my part I saw no inequality between myself and Miss Vulson, was flattered by the circumstance, and went into it with my whole heart, or rather my whole head, for this passion certainly reached no further, though it transported me almost to madness, and frequently produced scenes sufficient to make even a cynic expire with laughter.

I have experienced two kinds of love, equally real, which have scarce any affinity, yet each differing materially from tender friendship.  My whole life has been divided between these affections, and I have frequently felt the power of both at the same instant.  For example, at the very time I so publically and tyrannically claimed Miss Vulson, that I could not suffer any other of my sex to approach her, I had short, but passionate, assignations with a Miss Goton, who thought proper to act the schoolmistress with me.  Our meetings, though absolutely childish, afforded me the height of happiness.  I felt the whole charm of mystery, and repaid Miss Vulson in kind, when she least expected it, the use she made of me in concealing her amours.  To my great mortification, this secret was soon discovered, and I presently lost my young schoolmistress.